I Apologize Profusely...

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        I am SO sorry I've been gone the last few days. I swear I have valid reasons. Reason numero uno: I have had many finals to study for. Stressful stuff. Reason numero dose: I have been quite ill. I am hypoglecmic (I think that's how it's spelled), so my blood sugar can get way out of wack, and I'm also athsmatic. You know how in the spring you get sinus issues and runny noses? We, not to sound gross, but instead of getting a runny nose, all my mucus and gunk has been going right into my lungs (yay, how fun) which has made breathing a bit difficult. I was given this weird medicene that honest to God tastes like rubbing alchohal, but I gurgle it and the fumes or whatever are drying up all the fluid in there. It's been kinda working, but if it doesn't improve by Monday I get my lungs drained, which is quite painful. So let's hope the icky medication works. Reason numero tres: I have had to mentally prepare myself for the wonderful amazing The Fault in Our Stars movie, which I will write a full review to in the next chapter update thingy majigy. Reason numero quatro (is that how you spell it?): I have had my big German project, which I will tell you all about here in a minute. Very stressful stuff. Reason numero cinco: I have been trying to get all my end of the year shit wrapped up. Cleaning out my locker, making sure all my grades are good, saying good-bye to a couple friends who are moving, ect. A little sad, but not really. It's mostly just a mess. I also am having quite a tough time with those friends who are moving, which I will tell you all about. And reason numero ses (again, my Spanish spelling is probably way off, but oh well.) : I have been preparing myself for my summer job. In all the other seasons, I just work at the fancy trailer park, but in the summer, I still work at the fancy trailer park (which by the way, I might quit. I'll leave a rant later.) but I also make balloon animals at carnivals and festivals and such, which is super fun. It's my own business, so I don't have to split the money or anyting, and I'm pretty good at it. I've said it before, I'm not a huge fan of little kids, but this is just really fun. Okay, now time to talk about how depressed I am about 2 friends of mine moving.

        The 1st friend is almost a relief honestly. It sounds so mean of me, but she is a very depressed and mentally ill person. She is a self-harmer, and has called me 4 times on the brink of committing suicide, which is extremely stressful. She called me while I was in Disney for a valid reason, but still, she knew I was on vacation, and it could've waited. She needs a lot of attention that I am just unable to give. I hope she can find people who can. She has a threapist and all that but I don't know, she needs something more I think. My 2nd friend was the one who attempted suicide earlier this year. I know it sounds like I'm only friends with depressed suicidal people, but I'm not, I tend to have quite a few friends, and all of them are very different people. But yeah, I;ve been friends with both for a while and I'm really sad about it. I didn't even think about it until now really. 3 days left. I don't know, I'm feeling pretty sad right now. Maybe it's because I've watched TFiOS twice in the last 24 hours, but I just feel like crying. I feel pretty mentally stable, as per usual, but I don't know. Actually, I think it might be because Augustus Waters has set my boy expectations unreachabley high, haha. No, it's something. I'll think about it and let you know when I figure it out. Every now and then I get really sad for no reason, so this is probably that. My German movie is proving to be quite complicated as well. Jackie told me she had it all set up and ready to go when she didn't and now I'm trying to get it all together and email her back and forth so it's ready by Monday and blahbidy blah. The reason I might quit my job at the trailer park is mostly because of my mom. She got me the job there because she works in the main office. I still had to get the job myself, but she recommended me and all that. But her boss is very mean to her, a total ass hat, and she's quiting. She's going to (fingers crossed) work for Habitat for Humanity. She applied but hasn't heard back, but I hope it works because she hates her job. Anyway, expect 2 more updates from me tonight. My TFiOS movie review and a rant about my exestential crisis. Okay? Okay.

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