P.S. I Love You. [E.G.D]

Chapter 17

//Kendall//
I woke up absolutely freezing, and my brain was so cold it took me a good five minutes to actually comprehend I was still in the forest. I looked down at my hands that I had forgotten were there as the cold had numbed away all sensation from my wrist to fingertips. I quickly shoved them in my hoodie pockets.

I took a deep breath and exhaled, intently watching the vapour escape through my purple lips.

I got to my feet and looked at the time on my phone: 6:58 am. Well I still have time to go to school as I really don't have anything better to do.

I began walking back through the forest, kicking the leaves that were the same colour as my orange shoes, stepping and snapping twigs under them. The grass was so tall that the morning dew on it began dampening my feet all the way up to my ankles.

I stopped walking as I saw my feet were about to meet the concrete pavement. I once again inhaled, before looking up and walking down the sidewalk.

I looked straight ahead of me, watching a little girl and boy holding hands, wearing corresponding t-shirts, one saying BEST and the other saying FRIENDS. My brain told me to smile at how me and Ethan used to be like that, but my smashed heart and soul prevented from feeling anything at all.

I was just left drained of emotions, the liveliness I was full to the brim with was just sucked out of me.

I looked back at the kids, "don't make him sad,
don't make him cry,
don't make him mad,
don't make him want to die...
don't do what I did,
because I did it all." I quietly said in a monotoned voice.

I carried on walking emotionless, just staring at nothingness in front of me. I subconsciously felt a tear drop from my eye. But I carried on walking, thinking nothing of it.

I arrived at school, an absolute mess, but I really couldn't care less anymore. I robotically opened my locker and took my first few lessons' books out. I harshly shut it before turning on my heels and walking to my home room to wait before lessons start.

//Ethan//
I quickly got out of bed, having a plan of what to do today; I'm not going to distance myself from Kendall, that will just make everything so much worse and it wasn't even her fault. I'm going to hang out with her like normal and hopefully we can get passed this bump in the road. AND I'm going to deal with that piece of shit- I mean Corey, actually no he is a piece of shit.

I got dressed, and attempted to do my hair but it just ended up looking like I grabbed an electric fence.

I missed Kendall not doing my hair, not sleeping by my side, not calling me by my many many nicknames, not laughing at my corny jokes, not making me watch a film with her, not going on late night drives with me, I missed it all, every last bit of it.

The only positive side to not sleeping at all last night was that I decided to write another letter for Kendall, I'm not giving up on us, not now, not when I'm about to sort everything out, we're so nearly there, I just know. Even though it may be a billion miles away, we are travelling at light speed to get there.

I grabbed my bag and swung it over my shoulder before leaping into my car. I looked to my right and glanced at the empty chair next to me, where Kendall always sat. I sighed, before driving off, knowing I'm going to fix it and she'll be back by my side in no time.

//skip car ride//

I arrived at school and ran around and opened the door on other side of the car to see no one. Oh yeah, Kendall's not here anymore. I awkwardly scratched the back of my neck before shutting the car door. Kendall being gone is really getting to me, I can't believe I pushed her away like that yesterday...I'm such a jerk.

//Kendall//
::lunch break::

I was in the cafeteria, surprisingly in a better mood, only because I was sitting opposite my one and only; Corey.
"So did you enjoy my game yesterday?" He smirked, whoops, All I was paying attention to during the game was E-e-ethan. God even saying his name in my mind is hard. "Of course." I replied half heartedly "My muscles are so big aren't they..." He said while subtly flexing, making it look like he naturally had big, broad muscles, but I knew what he was doing. "Uhhh, sure, yeah." I said awkwardly. "Does that make you get turned on? horny? wet?" He said low, with a dark grin on his face. I was getting so uncomfortable I needed to get out of this situation. "I'm gonna go to the bathroom, excuse me." I said while getting up. "Oh, I see, want me to help?" He smirked. "No?" I replied confused before walking away, like, I think I can wipe my vagina by myself thank you very much.

I had just entered the toilets, when it struck me: did he think I wanted to go and masterbate?! What the actual fuck?!

This can't be him, this can't be letter boy, Corey is pulling some mind game on me for sure, he can't be, can he? Letter boy was THE most humble, sweetest thing...I shouldn't have been so gullible to believe those letters, I shouldn't have believed that there really was a boy out there just like 'letterboy'. But that means Ethan lied to me, he told me letterboy was perfect for me, but obviously he must've just said that to try and help Corey set me up with him. I can't believe him, I told him I trusted him, and he still lied. And I can't believe Corey either, he's a liar, and I'm going to prove it.

I left the toilet and went to my locker to get the letters so I could ask Corey what exactly he wrote in the letters to see if he really did write them.

To my absolute surprise, I saw Ethan standing there, staring into space, just like how I was this morning. I hesitantly walked up to my locker as well as him. He snapped out of his trance and looked at me smiling. I looked at my locker, getting the letters. "Hi Kendall," he spoke in a happy tone, "How was classes? I got so much homework from Mr.Scuppie it's unreal, like sometimes I just want to put on some magic sunglasses and disa-" He was cut off by a HARD slap in the face from me. He looked at me shocked, holding his cheek.

How

dare

he.

"HOW FUCKING DARE YOU! I CANT BELIEVE YOU! HOW CAN YOU JUST CALL SOMEONE HORRIBLE NAMES, MAKE THEM FEEL ABSOLUTELY WORTHLESS, LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT, AND THINK ITS OKAY TO ACT PERFECTLY FINE AS IF NOTHING EVEN HAPPENED! NOT EVEN A DAMN APOLOGY ETHAN!! HOW. FUCKING. DARE YOU." I snarled at him, fuming with rage. I can't believe him right now.

//Ethan//
I held onto my cheek and felt my eyes water up, not because the slap hurt, even though it kind of did, but because I've never EVER seen her this mad at me in my life and it was just heart shattering. When she yelled at me, it felt like everything was going in slow motion, because everything was going so wrong to the point where I didn't feel like what was happening was even real.

I watched her little chin quiver as she desperately tried to look for an answer in my eyes as my mouth didn't provide her with one. I was speechless. I had been proved so wrong that anything I say couldn't possibly defend me. I tried so hard so say something, anything, but I just couldn't.

Tears spilling from her eyes, she shook her head at me, before turning around and walking away.

I watched her walk away and noticed she was still wearing her all orange outfit from yesterday, she didn't sleep well, hell, I don't think she even slept and it's all my goddamn fault.

I saw how broken she was just by the way she walked.

I fell to my knees just as she turned the corner, and cried and cried and cried, not caring if anyone was looking.

I never thought it would end like this, Kendall, I really didn't.

//Kendall//
I fell to my knees just as I turned the corner, and cried and cried and cried, not caring if anyone was looking.

I never thought it would end like this, Ethan, I really didn't.

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psst, it's not the end btw if u thought it was