Nuts and Bolts [Nico Di Angelo X Avengers]

| Chapter 6 |

Me: *crawling out from the grave* IM BACK FROM THE DEAD, AND TO APOLOGIZE, HERE'S A LONGER CHAPTER THAN MY NORMAL ONES

((PLEASE DON'T KILL ME))

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"Okay, so you were right."

Nico, from where he was sitting on Leo's bunk, didn't even look up. "I'm afraid you're gonna have to be more specific. I'm right about a lot of things."

"Uh. Okay, first of all," Leo said, placing his hands on his hips, "get off my bed, mister. That's for smexy times, and smexy times only."

"...Uh," said Nico, squinting up at Leo. "Are you suggesting—"

"I'm suggesting you get the heck off my bed," Leo interrupted. "Right now, immediately, tout de suite."

"Your French accent is terrible," Nico huffed, flopping over on his side. "Why should I move? It's not like you get any action in the sheets anyway."

Leo's jaw dropped in disbelief. "Why you gotta call me out like that, man?"

Nico shrugged. "Am I wrong?"

Silence.

"Move over," Leo grumbled, and Nico obliged with a grin. The son of Hephaestus plopped down on the bed, legs crossed. "You're a cruel little man, Nico Di Angelo."

"You're shorter than me," Nico pointed out flippantly, shuffling through the cards in his hands. "You're shorter than everyone, actually."

Leo grimaced. "Yes, I am vividly aware. Percy made a list of jokes to remind me."

Nico stopped shuffling. "...Wait. You mean an actual list of short jokes? Like, 'How's the weather down there' and all?"

Leo nodded.

Nico shook his head and whistled. "Sucks to be you."

"Yeah, thanks." Leo frowned and craned his neck to get a better look at the cards. "Uh. Is that Mythomagic?"

"Mmhm." Nico smiled and held up an Apollo card. "Will got me back into it. He said he wanted to learn."

"Ugh," Leo said, in mock-disgust. "You guys are so sweet you're giving me cavities."

"No, that's from all the Sour Patch Kids you eat."

Leo pointed a finger at his face. "I did not come here to be attacked."

"It's a fun bonus. Comes with the package," Nico told him, motioning to himself. "Anyway. What was that you were saying about me being right?"

"Ah, yeah." Leo's fingers fiddled with a few pipe cleaners that seemed to have magically appeared in his hands. "Well. I met Stark today."

Nico stopped shuffling the cards. "Wait. You—"

"Met Tony freaking Stark? Yeah." Leo sighed wistfully and stared at the top of the bunk. "T'was a dreary New York day in the Walmart food aisle—"

"Stop," Nico ordered, holding a finger out. Leo raised his eyebrows, as if to say 'what?' "None of your usual dramatic flair crap. What happened? And... why were you shopping for food at Walmart? For that matter," Nico continued, with a frown, "why the hell was Tony Stark, genius extraordinaire and renowned billionaire, at a Walmart at seven thirty pm?"

"Because he's basically a white suburban Mom who knows that the dinner crowd usually passes after six o'clock, and because apparently he needed to restock on Go-Gurts." At Nico's bewildered look, Leo shrugged. "I dunno, man. I didn't ask him. One simply does not question Tony Stark."

"I'm questioning why we're friends," Nico deadpanned. "Did you talk to him?"

"Well." Leo tilted his head. "Yeah... Maybe? No, not really."

"...There are three options for me to choose from there."

Leo shook his head. "Sorry. Uh, he asked me if I knew where the Cheez Its were. I was kind of in shock, so I just said "Aisle three" and he left."

Nico stared at him. "You're a moron."

"Yup," Leo agreed. "But I'm the moron who gave Tony Stark directions to the Cheez Its aisle in Walmart, so it cancels out in the end."

"That's not how—you know what? Never mind." Nico crossed his arms. "Also, what the hell was I 'right' about? I'm not hearing anything about my genius."

"That's 'cause it's non-existent," Leo snickered, then shut up when Nico shot him a glare. "Sorry. I meant you were right when you said Stark was intact. You weren't lying."

"That was anticlimactic," Nico snorted. "Do you really have so little faith in me that you assumed I would actually blow up the richest guy in America because he was being an asshole?"

Leo gave him a pointed look.

Nico stared back, then shrugged. "Alright, yeah, that's fair."

"At any rate," Leo said, putting aside the pipe cleaners he had twisted into a mini-helicopter. "I don't actually think he's as much of a jerk as he seems to be."

Nico's eyebrows narrowed and he opened his mouth to protest, but Leo cut him off before he could say anything. "Hang on. Just hear me out, alright? Give me a minute."

Grudgingly, Nico settled back down, hands fiddling with the strings of his hoodie. "Fine. One minute."

"I didn't mean literally — okay," he added hurriedly, seeing Nico counting down on his fingers. "Right. So, um, obviously, he's a well-known figure, right? He gets his fair share of media exposure, and there's a big glaring spotlight stuck on him, and since the entirety of society is kind of really fucked up—"

Just then, the cabin door flew open with a loud BANG, effectively cutting Leo off.

"Leo," Nya gasped, eyes wide, "you'll never guess who's wandering around outside the camp."

"Is it—"

"Say 'Shaggy, our Lord and Savior' one more time and I'll bash your skull in."

Leo's mouth clicked shut slowly.

"Who is it, Nya?" Nico asked, sliding off the bed. Mortals hovering around the camp wasn't unheard of, but it wasn't altogether common, either. "Please tell me it's not another random pizza guy."

Nya shook her head, eyes wide. "No, this is even better!"

Leo groaned. "Can you please just tell us? The anticipation is killing me!"

Nya grinned. "It's—"

"HOLY SHIT, IS THAT TONY STARK?"

"...Oh, for Hades's sake."

#LetLeoSayFuck2019

I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter! It's a bit longer than the others, partially to catch up with the story, partially as an apology for going all dead-author on your asses.

At any rate, it's late and I've got to get my beauty sleep. Thanks for tuning in!

See you soon,

Rach

(P.S. If you see any typos, please let me know. Autocorrect was being a bitch today)