Nora

Chapter 24: Facing Reality

Dad comes home the next morning looking tired. I can't blame him, I'm tired too. Mom wants to talk to him but he says he just wants to have a shower and sleep and she lets him. I can tell she's upset but she knows she needs to let Dad be mad for a while. After all he was the one telling us both I'd get my heart broken.

After I'd finished spewing my guts up and had a good old cry Mom put me back to bed. She sat with me and patted my hair like when I was a little kid. And if I'm being honest it was really nice. When she thought I was asleep I heard her whisper, "My baby, I love you. You'll always be my baby. I don't know what I'm going to do without you." I was exhausted though and fell asleep a few minutes afterwards. 

Around one O'clock Dad wakes up. He still looks drained but a little less angry. After he's shaken off that just woken up feeling he tells Mom that they need to talk. I take this as a signal to get the hell out. So I tell them I'm going for a walk and they nod a little distractedly. 

I decide to go into town and get some lunch. I would like to take a walk like I told Mom and Dad I was doing but I don't have the energy. My physical capability is getting less and less and even walking the short distance into town makes me breathless and dizzy. 

On my way I think about what Mom and Dad could be discussing. Well I really hope they're discussing and not just fighting. I mean they're not the fighting type of parents or at least around me. The biggest fight I've seen them have was when Dad forgot to pick me up from school when I was around twelve. That was back when twelve year olds didn't have iPhones and neither did their parents, I'm not even sure the iPhone was around back then (yes way back when I was twelve). One of the teachers had to bring me home where Mom was waiting. She'd had a fit when she found out what happened. Dad had been out at the shops and forgotten he needed to pick me up. Mom had yelled and screamed about him being an irresponsible parent and what could have happened to me. 

But the fight they'd had yesterday was much worse. It felt more serious, like it couldn't just be fixed by an apology. 

I know that a lot of couples divorce after losing a kid and I really, really don't want my parents to be one of them. But I'm being silly, this is one fight. If I can forgive Mom then so can Dad.

I buy some fish and chips and a Coke and head back down to the beach. There's something really peaceful and uplifting about sitting on that beach. It just makes everything seem like it’s going to be okay.

It busy down there today. A lot of families swimming with their kids, a bunch of tourists not swimming in between the flags despite the lifeguards yelling at them again and again. I sit down in one of the areas that's less occupied. 

To my right a little boy and his Dad are building a sand castle. I smile. What a joy it is to be a little kid. Except we don't realize it until we're older. Being young is the best time in your life. No responsibilities, no drama, no body issues, no awareness of the havoc going on around you. I mean I guess it has its drawbacks considering when you're two you don't exactly know how to communicate and you either have to wear nappies or use a potty. But other than that it's great. I wish I could be a kid again. 

I look to my left and see a girl running. She looks familiar but I haven't got my glasses on (not that I ever wear them anyway) so she's out of focus. She looks like she recognises me too. Oh no. 

"Riley! Oh my god Riley hey!" It's Nora. She's less than a fifty metres away now and there is no escape. I repeat there is no escape.

My palms break out in a sweat and my heart starts doing that weird starty stoppy thing it does when I'm panicking. Nora keeps running toward me and I give her a half smile. This is really not what I need right now. It really isn't.