Bane

November 26, 1993

Cameron sat next to Gina. She did not flinch, or make further space between them. "When I presented my convoluted story to Grifford, he knew I was lying. He knew it, because Suheila told him so. She knew the truth. She knew, because she saw it."

"She was there."

Cameron shook his head. "In a manner of speaking."

"She's a witch."

"No. Not exactly... she's one of those other things that aren't. She can see the truth in things. She saw us there. Saw Brenna in the water. Saw me beating you. Griff just listened, and let me lie to his face. Commended me, even. Called me a hero... and then called her in, and she called me out. It was made clear that lying on your behalf was a valiant effort. That if I loved you enough to come up with such a shit plan, I must really want you. It was made clear that once was fine. Twice, though?"

"You were threatened into submission."

"I was promised. I'm no good for you, Gina. I'm no good for anyone. I promised if you didn't work out, I'd be willing to maybe accept someone else. The gypsy? I don't want to marry her. I don't want to marry first, second, or third cousins. There was only ever one woman for me, and that's off the table now."

"...because of The Order."

"No, because I beat you, and hurt you, and I did it because I believed it was the correct course of action. I am not worthy of your hand, or anyone's."

"You've never been a coward, or so defeatist." Gina lay her head on his shoulder. He put his arm around her. Gina hardened her face. "Cameron, I swear to you I'll do whatever it takes to win your trust. I'll do better. I'll be better."

Cameron stood, pushing Gina off him. He turned  to face her. "Can you stop sounding like the forgiving battered housewife for just one goddamned moment?"

"You did it because you love me."

"Do you listen to yourself when you're talking? You sound like anyone who's ever let someone hurt them, excuses ad-nauseam. There is no reason, and no excuse for what I did. It is inexcusable, and unforgivable."

"...but I forgive you, anyway."

"Dinner is ready. Join me down stairs, please."

Gina turned away from Cameron. "I'm not particularly hungry, Cameron Dean. You're mine, and I'm telling you right now. I am yours. If you walk away from this one, I'll still be here. If you put me out on the street, I'll not go running back to Bishop. I'll wait in the rain if I have to. You'll be the death of me before I give up on you."

"Should I leave your plate out?"

Gina was off the side of the bed, rushing Cameron before he could react. She had him against the wall, off his feet, held up in her hand by his throat. "Even with your rites and blessings, even before I had mine, I could have taken you. I've been training longer, and I'll tell you what else. Without rites and blessings, people can still kill you. Plenty have killed people in your order with a well aimed bullet, or a lucky shot, and they weren't even trained. I fight better than you because all I've done since the day you saved me from that motherfucker, is fight. Train, and fight, and win."

"...can't breathe." Cameron held Gina's wrist with both hands, and pushed, but she did not let go.

"This is what it feels like to be powerless, Cameron Dean. This is how I feel right now. Right here!" Gina put her free hand over her heart. "When you tell me you've made a decision for the both of us, when I know how you feel, this is what it feels like for me. It doesn't feel good, does it?"