How Do You Feel About Me Now? One Direction Lirry Fan fiction.

Management

AN-

I have been writing this for a while, but I have to go out. I thought you might want what I have. However, I've already started writing Harry's part and it should be up tonight. Sorry for the wait.

Liam pov

I wonder if the look of regret in his eyes is sincere.  He's so good at convincing people that he's contrite. He's not going to get me with the false sincerity again. Sometimes I wonder how he does it-- how he manages to not care about people. I'm not saying that he's a bad person, but it seems like he doesn't care what we do.

I feel myself get nauseous again while we're going down the staircase to leave. My knees buckle and I grab the bar at the same time as someone wraps their arms above my waist. Then it hits me, the smell of his aftershave. I feel my heart rate increase and I want to just turn around and give him a hug.

I take a deep breath and look over my shoulder offering up a thanks. I see worry and concern in his eyes. I take a shocked breath and finally mutter out "thanks"

"Are you alright Liam?"

"Yeah fine,  just a bit overwhelmed"

I see the guilt flash in his eyes again before he says, "Okay, well I'll keep an eye out to make sure don't go falling down the stairs." he offers me up his most brilliant smile and I feel my knees start to go weak again. As if it wasn’t enough that I’m in love with him, he has to also be able to affect me physically?

Harry tightens his hold on my waist and we awkwardly and probably a bit dangerously as well, go down the stairs. When we reach the bottom I take a deep breath grateful that I didn’t fall down the steps and that I’ll be able to stop having a mini heart attack once Harry’s arms are around mine.

Yet, Harry doesn’t pull away. He unwraps one arm and keeps the other wrapped around my waist as we walk side by side to the car. My heart is still fluttering in my chest as I feel the burn of his fingers on my side. My body is tingling where it connects with his; it’s almost as if it’s trying to suck in the feeling to commit it to memory.

We finally get to the van and I jump in the back to stretch out. No one gives me strange looks since they know that I’m not feeling well. Really, I just didn’t want to sit next to Harry for this drive over to the office. I hate sitting next to him. I hate being able to smell the scent of whatever cologne he’s put on that day, but that’s not even the worst part. The worst part is the fighting that goes on in my head while he sits next to me. I sit frozen next to him praying he doesn’t touch me – and hoping that he does.

I watch his legs, waiting for the shock that will come the moment his knee even grazes mine. He’s like an addiction. I try to fight it, but I’m willing to take all the pain for the second of pleasure. Harry and I are the least close in the band; which is beneficial because having your heart race constantly probably isn’t any good for you, but then I wonder what it would be like to have him touch me as often or as much as he does Lou. I’d melt in his hands, he’d lean back into my chest and I wouldn’t be able to stop myself from placing gentle kisses into his hair –whispering I love you.

I only get to be with Harry in my dreams; I really don’t know whether or not to call them nightmares. When I first wake up the content of them haunt me, but when I go about my day, it’s soothing to know that at least in my dreams I get the guy I want.

I close my eyes and lean against the window, willing these dreams to come to me; it’s the only time I can call him mine.

“LIAM!” I hear someone scream. I open my eyes to see a very concerned Niall leaning over the chairs in front of mine.