ch. 18 || indelible

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A/N - this scene contains some, err, um rude stuff so if you don't want to read that, just ignore the sections marked by .

Ps: please comment and vote <3

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XVIII. indelible

[Zayn's POV]

On the 45th day of knowing Thalia, we were due to head back home tomorrow which, all in all, meant this was my last full day with her.

I was annoyed with her for acting so cold and distant with me the night before, especially after our near perfect day. She had tried so hard for us. I just didn't understand.

Still, she was back to normal and seemed to sense that I was upset with her, keeping her distance slightly.
I sighed, deciding giving her the cold shoulder was doing no good for either of us.
Turning to look at her in the elevator, I placed my hand on her arm gently.
"I'm sorry." I mumbled.
She peeked up at me and nodded. Slowly, she smiled, and I knew I was forgiven.
"I hate when we fight." She murmured, her voice mirroring mine with the similar hesitation and quietude.
"Me too," I held out my hand across the short but noticeable distance between us, "Peace?"
She placed her hand in mine, shaking it firmly. I tried ignoring the tremble sent down my spine from the contact and focused on her eyes.
Even under the bright lights of the lift, her eyes seemed to outshine them. That was one thing I found myself always admiring about her - her eyes. They were golden and twinkling even when she was in another of her melancholy moods; it was as if her eyes betrayed her and they were constantly battling to give her some light.

The doors slid open and we stepped out into the lobby of the hotel, where large windows had no privacy for someone like me.
Thalia gripped my hand tighter as we strolled outside, as if she too was nervous.
Fortunately, we were ushered inside a car before the paps could do much apart from take pictures. They tapped on Thalia's darkened window and I held her to myself as she watched on in horror.
One held the car door as we were about to drive away, "Zayn, is this your girlfriend?!"
Cameras flashed.
Zayn, is it true you and Perrie split up?
I stretched over and grabbed the door handle, ready to slam it shut.

One photographer refused to move.
I fixed him with a solid stare, "If you don't step away, you'll get your hand jammed."
He wisely stepped back, glaring at me as I closed the car door, and Thalia and I were driven off into central Amsterdam.
Thalia appeared to be in another of her brooding moods, and I'd learned to leave her to it. Today, however, I wanted to talk to her. Desperately.

As we carefully ate our breakfast in a little bistro, I mulled over what to say to her.
"Thalia?" I asked, placing my cutlery side by side in the centre of my plate once I'd finished.
She peeked up at me and chewed slowly, raising an eyebrow.
(Silence.)
I cleared my throat and she lifted her glass of water, drinking it slowly as if it was to match her slow and steady heartbeat.

I cleared my throat again, deciding to just say it. Thalia was still in a mood with me, I could tell.
"You know that bookshop we went to the other day?" She nodded her head, her undivided attention set on me and my awkward fiddling thumbs.
"Well, I saw one of those mirror balls in a box of discounted books - your eyes remind me of it." She blushed, and I exhaled.
"Zayn, you can't just...say things like that." She pressed a hand to her chest, approximating the location of her heart.
She then smiled; and not just a simple, smile-tugging-at-the-corners smile, but a full, unbidden, unlidded teeth-showing-impeccably-enchanting smile. I hadn't seen it in a while, and forgot to breathe.
"God, you're beautiful." I mumbled under my breath.
I didn't particularly say it out loud for her to hear, but it wasn't necessarily something I'd try to hide from her - she was beauty. She truly was.
Thalia shook her head, "No, Zayn. You are. You're the kindest person I've met and you have no idea."
I absorbed her words for a moment, contemplating. Was I?
My religion allowed me to be good and kind but I'd never imagined myself as good - I was woven from both bad and good, but the bad was always most visible.

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