Nicki:
"Okay pretty girl you're up." Tanya, the director of my come back photo shoot said to me. It has been a few years since I was last in front of the camera but I missed it. I was too grown to be dancing in some random rappers music video. I wanted to model for fashion, that's it.
I stood up and almost fell right back on my ass. My head was spinning and my ears started ringing. "Are you okay?" Tanya asked with a concerned look on her face. "Yeah I think I just got up too fast." She still had this worried look "Do you need a minute?"
"No I'm fine." I flashed her a small smile and ran my fingers through my hair. "Are you sure?"
"Yeah I'm-"
The next thing I knew, I woke up to bright lights in a hospital bed with a nurse shaking her head at me.
"Don't look at me like that Mary." I said when she side eyed me as she adjusted my IV line. "I told you to take it easy Nicki." She said in a disappointing tone. I really didn't need this.
"I am. Can I go home now?" I asked, I had to go home. Christmas was coming up and I had things to do.
Mary sighed and sat on the edge of the bed. "Not this time sweetie." I frowned "What do you mean?"
"It's not looking good...your Kidneys, they're shutting down faster than we expected." I threw my head back into the pillow and sighed. "You're still on the transplant list and we're trying our hardest but-" I cut her off, I knew what was coming. My time was up. "It's not guaranteed I'll get something right?"
"I'm sorry." She said sadly. I had known Mary a couple of months now, she was here the first time I fainted in the middle of street on my way to an casting call and some random guy carried me here. We'd gotten to known eachother and she reminded me of a much nicer version of my mom. "Don't apologise. This is all on me."
"The lady that brought you in, Tanya she said she had to go and that she'd been back later...You was knocked out for a while so I called your emergency contact..." Mary mumbled the last part. She already knew what I was going to say.
"What the fuck Mary?! I don't want nobody here!" I yelled. The first time I came in here I made it clear to everybody that I didn't want anyone to know my business but me, my nurses and my doctor. "It was time. I refuse to let you deal with this by yourself for any longer...He's waiting outside, I'll call him in." She left the room and seconds later Dave walked in with a concerned look. I knew I should've removed him from my emergency list.
"Nicki." I looked up and smiled. Dave stepped further into the room, closing the door behind him. "What happened? You good?" He was speaking so casually. He probably thought I relapsed and was back on the shit again.
"Well I just found out that the medication they had me on isn't working and I'm dying so yeah I guess I'm okay." I shrugged sarcastically. I hated hospitals. "Wait hold up. Dying?" He walked closer to the bed confused. "What're you talking about Nic?"
"All that shit I put in my body is finally catching up with me." Years of liquor and drug abuse finally hit me back. My liver was fucced and my Kidneys were hanging on by a thread.
"Yo stop that!" He roughly grabbed my face. "This shit ain't funny, stop playing." In that moment I couldn't hold it in anymore, I finally let my tears flow from eyes, for the first time since getting the news myself it just hit me how real this was.
Dave gently let go. "How long?" I shook my head. "It doesn't matter." I didn't know exactly how long I had left before my body completely shut down but I knew it was soon. "Yes it does. How long?" He asked lowly, I kept quiet. "NICKI HOW LONG?!"
"A year... Maybe less." I shrugged. "I don't know." He shook his head "I just got you back."
"D I'm sorry." I cried. This was really all my fault. I was selfish and now I was about to lose everything. Dave, my kids, my life. I expected Dave to get up and pull me into his arms but he did the complete opposite, he turned around and walked towards the door. "Where're you going?" I asked but he just kept walking and left me alone in tears.
"What happened?" Mary asked when she returned and saw me crying. "I gotta get out of here." I tugged on my IV trying to get it out so I could leave. "Don't do that!"
"I need to go home Mary. I gotta see my kids." I begged.
"What don't you understand? This situation is serious. If you leave this hospital today you will die!" She said harshly.
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Sorry it's been forever & short.
