The Grim Reaper Effect

-T H I R T Y - F I V E-

I'm going to be dead in four months.

Alone.

I felt a blanket of loneliness cover me. It was cold. And there, even feeling the weight of reality suffocating me, I still felt so calm and clear. I knew I was going to die, but I had a new outlook on it. I wasn't going to die and leave a huge legacy behind. I wasn't going to be remembered by everyone. I wasn't about to feel a great sense of satisfaction before I die. Dying isn't the gateway to happiness and satisfaction. Only living can grant you those things.

I'm only a child.

There were a lot of things in life I'd never be able to experience. My child self wouldn't be happy with how I left this earth. The thought shook me to the core. The word 'never' was more evident in my life. More than ever now.

"Mackenzie?" Griffin's voice was soft, welcoming.

I sighed and turned to him, "I'm sorry, Griffin."

He shook his head, taking a seat next to me, "No need to apologize. You're tired, I get it."

Without thinking, I rested my head on his shoulder. I went to remove my head, realizing what I did, when he draped his arm over my shoulder. I forced myself to relax. We sat in silence for a while, both in thought. It was a comfortable silence, one I was grateful for.

"You know, I've been doing this job since I was sixteen. Almost four years of experience. In those years, I've never met anyone quite like you, Mackenzie," He said, reflecting on his life. "I can honestly say I've learned more from you than in any class I've taken. Thank you."

I felt myself smile, "Same here, Griffin."

"Like how much I've been missing out on. Sleds, Ferris wheels, superheroes, movies-"

"Don't forget my dog who you so graciously stole."

He chuckled, "The dog likes what he likes."

After a while of talking and reflecting, I was ready to go home and get some sleep. I grabbed my robes and followed Griffin back to his car. We sat up there for about two hours, in peace. We didn't move. We didn't argue. We just talked. Moments like that I hope I never forget. Even after death. I wanted to keep that close to me.

-*-

I secured my cap on my head and took a deep breath. Today was the day and I couldn't wait for it to be over. I smiled at my reflection. I headed into the living room to get my cords. Last night, I fell asleep watching tv and adding last minute adjustments to my robes. Once I had them on, I slid into my heels and waited for my ride. My family agreed to meet me there.

Graduating was so bittersweet. On one hand, I made it and I get the degree to prove just that. On the other, high school was over. There were no more memories to be made. This four-year chapter of my life was officially ending today. Though, I'd be lying if I said I wasn't excited to see what life outside of Applewood halls were like.

Before I could get too lost in thought, my phone buzzed. I smiled to myself, ready for the big day. I strutted outside, striking a pose the second I stepped foot out the door. I was greeted with clapping. I shut and locked the door behind me.

"Thank you, thank you," I curtseyed.

"Flawless execution. Bravo," Griffin cheered.

I laughed before getting in the car, "We need to get going if we wanna get there on time."

He nodded, and we were on or way. It didn't take long to get to the venue. The parking lot was almost completely packed. I got dizzy just thinking about trying to get out. We met up with Indie and Bradley. Kira and Julie were already inside.