crave. // punk niall horan.

Prologue.

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At 5 years old, most kids would be playing with toy trucks, or barbies that represented an impossible level to reach of perfection.

But she was different, she noticed the perfection level of these dolls. She noticed the bright blonde hair, she noticed the eyes, how they curved up like a felines. The legs, long and slender. The stomach, flat and smooth. The breasts, large and perky. She always asked,

"Mommy, why can't I look like that?"

At 7 years old, most kids would be on their daddies shoulders, squealing of delight, their laughter filling the warm air around them.

But she was different, she noticed how all her friends dads would run and hug them, kissing their cheeks and asking how their day was. She noticed how her daddy didn't do that. She noticed how her dad pushed her mom around, hit her brother with various objects, and had taken a special liking to throw her down the stairs. She would always ask,

"Mommy, why does daddy hurt us?"

At 12 years old, most kids would be playing with their siblings. Fighting over something stupid, like the bathroom, or who gets the last cookie.

But she was different, she noticed how her brother talked with his hands, and came home with bruises on his knuckles. She noticed how he fought against daddy, and was teased about his sign language. She noticed how he was always angry, and signed angry gestures with his hands behind everyone's back. She always asked,

"Mommy, why doesn't Liam talk?"

At 13 years old, most kids would be starting high school, putting on make up, straightening their hair, getting their first kiss, getting a new bestfriend.

But she was different, she noticed how her best friend preferred black over everything. She noticed how he liked carrying around a knife, how he liked the feeling of it digging into his skin, when he was really upset. She noticed how he liked talking about things that made people cringe, but she just smiled and hugged him, adoring how different he was, and how she just wanted to help him. She always asked,

"Mommy, why does Zayn like to hurt himself?"

At 15 years old, most kids would be in high school, laughing with their friends, shopping in malls, going on dates.

But she was different, she was in the hospital, holding her moms hand. She noticed how her mom was more pale than usual, her eyes were empty and her cheeks sunk in. She noticed how her mom couldn't breathe and how she could barely move. She always asked,

"Mommy, when will you get better?"

Now at 16 years old, Mommy is in the hospital, Daddy is in jail, Zayn still hurts himself and Liam has selective mutism. Now at 16 years old, she's still different.

But different's good.. Right? Hopefully. Because who would want a girl who was pure in a toxic world?

Well, maybe a toxic boy.