Just Us

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My name is Kevin Starling. I am what the doctors call a "chimerical twin". What this means for me, is that when I was in the womb, I had a non identical twin sister, but I absorbed her. This means I have two separate strands of DNA. Most of the time, when a twin absorbs the other fetus it’s not detected early and will only be discovered when the doctor is testing for another illness. In my case, sorry our case, several things made it apparent at birth. One of my eyes is hazel and the other is blue. I have brown hair on my head but blond hair everywhere else. I am a big guy, but my feet are dainty.

My parents thought this to be no more, than a novel turn of events, that could make for conversation. The doctors said they saw no reason I could not lead a normal life. What they don’t know is what I have been dealing with all my life. Along with the two strands of DNA, I also have two consciousnesses going on inside my head. My parents named my sister Kara.

Kara can only talk to me. She is a voice inside my head. She is getting insanely pissed off right now; because I keep referring to us as,” I” or “my”. She has no control over our body. She can control nothing, but complains and protest frequently. I am not a mean person. I do take her into consideration sometimes, but one of our biggest problems is, she is heterosexual. So when I am with a woman she is completely repulsed. It's kind of a mood killer for me, when I’m kissing a woman, and in my head I hear, “Oh my god that is disgusting”. You don’t even want to know what masturbation is like.

I believe we share sensations. When I feel, WE feel pain sometimes she responds to it. I KNOW! When I have sex she…This is a very hard story to write because Kara is reading as I type this. She is having a fit on the things that I am saying. She doesn’t like it that I am “Putting our business on front street”, her words not mine.

I know there is no medical procedure to remove my sister from inside me. She is not a physical thing that can be removed. Medication would only numb us both out. I understand her sorrow because she is a person trapped in another person’s body with no recourse. It must be a miserable existence. I’m going to stop now because she is crying. Sometimes I think "WE" would be better off with a bullet in "OUR" head!

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