Shadow Life

Shadow Life Chapter 13

Shadow Life

Chapter 13

Christian's POV:

It has been a month since Ana returned to me, and I couldn't be happier but, I am also worried about her as well, because she is still so scared to even think about leaving Escala. I have been working from home most days, and when I do leave the penthouse to go to Grey House, it is for short trips only. If I am gone longer than an hour, Ana has a panic attack. But, I am also planning a trip to Tokyo because Roz has informed me that the East Asia deal will be unsalvageable without my personal presence in the meetings. So, I must think about Ana traveling with me, because I am not leaving her here in Seattle alone.

I truly understand why she has these panics attacks, I do, because of all the trauma she went through, but at some point, I will need to be able to leave her alone all day to go to the office. I think back to when I brought up maybe having to go to East Asia to fix that deal Roz needed me to salvage. But in good conscience I couldn't pull myself from Ana, I really couldn't.

That night, when we were sitting down to dinner, I decided to bring up the possibility of going on the trip. I was nervous to broach the subject of the trip because of Ana's reaction and possible panic attack.

"Ana, baby, I need to talk to you about something important that has come up."

Ana looks anxiously at me with wide eyes and anticipation. I try and reassure her with a touch on her hand that it is nothing to really worry about, but I can see that she is still nervous.

"There is a business trip that I need to attend to save a business deal in East Asia. I would not go if the deal was not important to GEH, and was not about to fall through. I wish it could really be avoided but, it cannot."

When I finish speaking I see the panic cloud Ana's face in an instant. Her eyes go wide, and her breathing becomes labored. She stood up from her chair and scrambled away from me, running to her room, she slams the door. I am right behind her by a few steps so when I get to her bedroom door I reach for the knob and twist the door open and, thankfully, she did not lock it in her haste to get away from me. What I am met with when I enter the room is a scared girl rocking back and forth against the wall.

I walk further into the room slowly and kneel in front of Ana. I notice she is muttering something to herself. It is so hard to make out because she is talking so softly, I must strain to hear her.

"Anastasia will be a good girl please don't leave. Anastasia will be a good girl I promise. Do not leave me please. I will do whatever master says, I will be good."

While she is saying this she is barely breathing, and all I can think is, "What did my brother do to my angel when she disobeyed him?" I can see that her breathing is still labored, and I am worried she might pass out soon from lack of oxygen.

"Baby, can you focus on me? Ana, I'm right here. I am not going anywhere."

She is still not focusing on me.

"Come on, baby, follow my lead and start breathing in and out. Follow my breathing pattern. Please, baby, focus on me."

When I realize she still cannot, or will not, focus on me, I feel myself begin to get frustrated and I realize, at this point, that I will have to take charge of the situation and bring her back to the present. So, I take her face in my hands.

"Baby, focus on me."

"Anastasia will obey master. Anastasia will be a good girl"

Again, I wonder what my sadistic brother did to my angel. I realize I am not getting anywhere with Ana this way. Being gentle is not working to get through to her. It is then I realize what I must do, and I hate that I must do this. I realize, to get Ana to come back to me, I need to use my dominate persona to get Ana to register that she needs to come back to the present. So, I slip in to my domination mode.