Falling in the Dark | ✓

32 | Regret

My mind races as I stumble over the memories of the past few weeks, ever since Felix and I started 'going out'. All this while, I'd been so caught up with forcing myself to choose Felix over Liam that I failed to see just how shallow Felix's feelings were. I was blinded to the truth, it didn't occur to me to notice the intentions behind his controlling and possessive nature until now.

"You said you didn't have enough control," I go on as Felix's face reddens. In anger or embarrassment, I can't tell. "I'm not going to be controlled by you. Nobody is. And as long as you act this way, we're never—"

Felix lets out another low chuckle, cutting me off mid-sentence. "Wow. You haven't apologized for cheating on me, not once. And now you're giving me bullshit about my behavior?"

Taken aback, I barely get three words out before I'm interrupted again. "No, I am sor—"

"Too fucking late now," Felix sneers, his dark eyes glinting like unpolished black granite. As he advances towards me again, the suffocating feeling returns with such intensity that my fists curl at my sides with the desire to bolt through the door.

"Look, we have an exam tomorrow," I say, inching my way around him to get closer to the door. The scent of his cologne pervades the space around him, causing me to yearn for some fresh air even more.

"I think you should go," I continue distractedly, but just as I'm about to wrap my fingers around the doorknob, Felix's hands grip my shoulders from behind and tug me backward.

"I don't think so, Carmen. We're not done here." Felix bends so our eyes are level, his arms still holding on to me as he presses me to the wall. Fear skitters down my spine when he says, in a cold, severe tone, "How dare you make it sound like your cheating was my fault . . ."

"I didn't say that! Let go of me! Felix, let go!" I shoot back, using my wrists to shove his hands away from my shoulders.

After repeated and persistent attempts to do this, Felix finally loosens his hold, releasing me from his iron grip. But his body is still pressed too close to mine, obstructing my breath and my vision, coating everything in an unpleasant shade of red.

Mustering all my strength, I slam my hands against Felix's torso, pushing him to the opposite wall. He reels back, and I take advantage of his surprise to throw the door wide open, letting the hallway's overhead light flood the entryway of my room. I move so I'm just outside, my back pressed to the door with the knob clutched firmly in my hand.

"Get out, Felix," I say to him, raising my voice to feign confidence. "Or else—"

"Or else what?" Felix's lips twist in a vile sneer as he steps out into the hallway. "What are you—"

Suddenly, the door opposite to mine is thrown open. Jessica — one of the two girls that occupy room 116 — comes out carrying a laundry bag. She smiles at me politely, but her face changes when she takes proper notice of me and Felix.

"Hey. Everything alright?" she says uncertainly, a tinge of awkwardness lingering in her voice that indicates the lack of familiarity between us.

"Yeah," I say, as Felix nods along with a toothy smile, thumbs raised in reassurance. As an afterthought, I point to him and add casually, "My boyfriend was just leaving."

"Okay, then. See you later!" Jessica says cheerily, hefting her laundry bag and shutting her room door before leaving. I watch the back of her head, her thick, dark-haired ponytail bobbing as she disappears down the deserted hall.

"What a good friend," Felix says, his voice dripping with sarcasm. My gaze snaps back to him when he shifts to lean against the door-jamb, crossing his arms. All the mirth he'd shown to Jessica has completely disappeared. He tips his head, as though a thought has just struck him. "Can't say the same about you, huh?"