Dear you

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Ive been listening recently to so much stuff , but this is the song that has inspired this - here is a heart by jenny own youngs
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I know I shouldn't think of you , I know I'm hating every moment my mind is spending that energy to pass the thought of you in mind.
Do you know how exhausted I am from the amount of times I have to convince my heart that you are not even interested in me as  a friend, the amount of times I give up on trying to convince it and let it bleed till it stops.
It hurts
It hurts that I think of you and you don't. It hurts that I’ve been treated badly from your side and here I am thinking of you. But don't let your ego fly too high. I'm not thinking of you in the lovey dovey way. I’m thinking of your perspective. After all your just a 15 year old teenager who goes to a mixed school, have seen enough girls to rate me below average, was ashamed of me and blocked me on social media , had the opportunity to go to Canada to finish your junior  and senior years of high school. Living the life of a teenage dream, what more could you want? While on the other side of the world, a girl who always cared for a douchebag like you, a girl that her heart used to jump whenever your name was mentioned or your presence has been declared.
Its sad really.
Its a story of a broken hearted girl whose trying so hard to move on that she just returns to square one every time she thought she did it. And here I am , square one , writing about a dead feeling I never truly tasted it.

Heart broken gal.

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