Lockwood and co oneshots

Mistakes

OK. I don't really know where I'm going with this. Angsty Lockyle ALERT . There may be self harm but don't be mad. It happens. Warning in advance.

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Lucy's POV ---------

It was a drizzly, gray winters morning at 35 portland row, and I, Lucy Joan Carlyle, was taking out the trash. I heaved it up into the main black bin, when some paper came fluttering out. I cursed under my breath so Lockwood wouldn't hear - he detests profanity - and stooped to pick up the paper. I noticed, as I scrambled on the floor to pick them up, that they had writing on them. Being the nosy soul I am, I tucked them in my jacket pocket to look at at a more opportune moment. Then, with a grunt of effort, I hurled the bag of rubbish into the bin and strolled back inside the house, the door slamming closed being me, cutting of the cold.

After a hearty breakfast of wholemeal waffles ( Holly forced me, OK?) And pancakes drizzled heavily with maple syrup (mmmmmmm...)I finally escaped company and ran up the stairs to my old attic room and shut the door behind me. I locked it for good measure, not wanting anyone else to see my stolen pieces of paper. Sitting down at my old, mahogany writing desk,  I tried to put the bits of paper in order. I evidently hadn't got the whole letter, but I was glad, for what I read there was enough to break my heart.

Dear Lucy.......reading this...........I know you......love me..........and you think I.......told........I'm sorry.....i love Holly............you......Lockwood.

No. No. No. How could this happen? When I had been sure....

But no. He loved Holly. That..... Ugh. The problem is, he's RIGHT. He's right to love her. She is pretty, kind, motherly, good at everything, not like ugly, talentless me. But that didn't stop it hurting. And it hurt. So much. Too much. I needed relief. A one way ticket out. 

Blinded by tears, I fumbled for my rapier and swiped it at myself. Because of my shaking hands, I missed my heart, and the point embedded itself in my shoulder. 

 Oh well, at least I may die of blood loss

Was the last thing I thought before I blacked out on the floor.

Lockwood POV ---------------

I was getting worried. Lucy hadn't come down for THREE HOURS now. I know it was stupid, but I worried so. Well, I did love her after all.

I told Holly my worry after another hour. I told her I thought something had happened. She flirted outrageously, as she bloody - oops, profanity!- always does when I'm around and told me to ignore it. I wouldn't be surprised if she secretly hoped something HAD happened to Lucy.

I tried not to worry but failed massively. I put aside my magazine and trooped upstairs to find Lucy.

I reached her room and knocked loudly on the door. No answer. I knocked again, still nothing. I pushed open the door and screamed.

"LUCY!" I screamed. "George CALL A BLOODY AMBULANCE!"

Lucy was slumped on the floor in a pool of blood with her own rapier stuck in her shoulder. I saw the letter I threw away on her table. I stride across the room and read it. She got the wrong idea! Then I saw along the bottom in Lucy's writing scrawled across the bottom: 

I cant go on. I love you

She loved me. And I wasn't there for her. I cried out again. "God" I heard George say,  approaching the door."Have you broke your toe agai- oh.oh no" he stepped inside. He joined me on the floor, and that is where we stayed, kneeling in her blood, tears joining it on the floor until Holly came up with the ambulance people.

Lucy POV -----------

Bleep Bleep. Bleep. Bleep.

"Ugh" I groaned as my eyes opened groggily. Where am I? What happened? Hey... Ow. My shoulder.... Wait... Oh yeah.... IM NOT DEAD!? 

"IM NOT DEAD?!" I shouted. A nurse ran into the room. "Oh you are awake! The young man, Lockwood has just arrived. I'll send him in. He'll be so happy to see you!" She smiled brightly. "My my, you're lucky to have a guy like him!" Giggling, she left the room.

"Wait, I -" 

She was gone. 

A second later, a wild eyed Lockwood burst into the room. His eyes were big, his hair messy and he was thinner than I remember. Like way WAY thinner.

"LUCY!!!" He rushed to me and hugged me like a drowning man clutching a life ring. "God I'm sorry. I'm so sorry...."

"What do you mean, why are you sor-"

"Luce you got it wrong. The letter, it really said 

Dear Lucy

I know you love me and think I don't love you. I told George this. He said that he was sorry but you thought I loved Holly so were mad with me. I don't love Holly. I love YOU. I hope you understand my reasons for writing this.

Yours for life

Lockwood."

"Oh". Was all I could think of saying. I was so happy. HE LOVED ME!!! I wanted to shout it to the skies. 

" so you see" he said, his breath hot on my cheek "There was no Need to worry" And with that he kissed me. Our lips melted together and I loved it. I loved him. 

"I love you too Lockwood"

He picked me up bridal style and carried me out of the ward. "Come on babe" we both giggled a bit at that "I need to get you checked out. And no" he said when I opened my mouth. I am ABSOLUTELY NOT putting you down, Lucy Joan Carlyle. I have a hella of a lot of missed time to make up for. I better start it now." He kissed me again and carried me away. We called a cab and drove home.

When we got back, I was greeted by an ashen faced Holly. "I'm so sorry!" She screamed "its all my fault!" And started crying. I quickly hugged her. "No worries Hol. I should have told you lot about my depression before. But you can't change the past." I let go of her and was immediately pulled into a hug by George. He pulled away and held me at arms length. "LUCY CARLYLE, NEVER DO THAT TO ME AGAIN!" He rored "YOU ARE LIKE A SISTER TO ME AND I COULDNT COPE IF YOU- if you....." He hugged me again. "Right. He said, back to himself again. "I made macaroni cheese" and walked into the kitchen "Yasssss!" I shouted! "Come on!" And pulled Lockwood and Holly into the kitchen with me. 

"Calm down babe!"

"BABE!" Holly shouted. I looked at her, and instead of anger, she was grinning "omg THE SHIP HAS SAILED!!" She hugged us tight and ran into the kitchen fangirling. Then we laughed, entwined hands and followed.

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~A ❤❤❤❤