I moved in with Taehyung two weeks ago, thinking that Taehyung was right. I am in no position to think about anything else when I'm barely paying my rent. I thought it would be okay for us to live together but I was wrong. It wasn't easy. We fought four days ago and we haven't seen each other since then because he hasn't been home. I know he's working and I trust that he is. I don't want to be the paranoid girlfriend. Taehyung and I talked about it, we agreed to be open minded about things especially with work but we always end up fighting because of it.
I hear a car pull up in front of the apartment — his car. Relief was what I felt even though I knew I'm supposed to be mad at him. He was wrong and he knew it but he just left without saying anything. He rang his own doorbell, expecting me to open the door for him. I didn't. He used his own keys to open the door, after all, it was his apartment. I listened to him entering. He took his shoes off and shuffled quietly into the bedroom. He switched on the lights but I pretended to read a book, sitting on the far side of his bed, my back leaning against the headboard while he stood in the middle of the doorway.
I know we fought and argued but not calling me or even texting me for four days straight? That was a crappy move for him. I worried for him. I lied down alone in his bed, thinking if he's okay or if he's sleeping comfortably. Who was he with this whole time? Where has he been? I wanted to tell him that I was worried sick for him but I stopped myself. This is not me. He's turning me into someone I hate.
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Taehyung was dressed in a grey turtleneck sweater and his usual black jeans. He sat down on the side of the bed opposite to me. I could feel his gaze on me yet he doesn't say a word. I got a handful of things that I want to tell him but I kept silent, knowing how things would end. We'll just fight again. He unzipped his bag and pulled out his laptop, placing it on his lap as he immersed himself in his work again. There was a huge gap between us that even silence cannot fill.
I couldn't take it anymore. I have to say something. "You really won't say a word, huh?"
His fingers froze, hovering over the mouse pad. Taehyung licked his lips and breathed deeply before he set his laptop aside, "I'm sorry. I was out of line that time."
"Yeah, you were." I told him coldly and he lowered his gaze. "If you hated me so much, why did you ask me to move in? If you hated me coming home smelling like other men, why did you date me in the first place? I was doing my job, what were you expecting?"
"I shouldn't have moved in with you." I added, watching Taehyung nibble on his lower lip. "I'm moving out."
"Don't." Taehyung lifted his head up. "It won't happen again. I promise."
"I appreciate that you're trying to understand me but you're not ready for this, Taehyung." I spoke softly, placing my hand on top of his. "I should've known that.."
