My life story

unedited draft: parents (rant)

 Parents. Parents are the people that are the mother or the father of a person or people that they see as the one that takes care of them. Parents most times are the reason why you have a roof over your head, food on your table, and clothes on your body. They will buy you anything you want so that you feel loved. But they don't have to buy you everything, for example, you might want to buy a huge Costco teddy bear that's extremely fluffy. But next thing you know, that huge fluffy bear that you want is too expensive and they don't buy the bear even when you already cried enough to make a puddle. Or maybe your family spent a lot of money on something like plane tickets to go out of state or maybe to fix an appliance in the house or even their car. But after all that money that was spent, you want to get something online in range of 10 to 30 dollars. But when you ask them if you can bye it, they tell you that there isn't any credit on their credit card. You had to sacrifice all of the money for Christmas presents and/or birthday party for a stupid thing that could've happened a different time. Your parents also try to protect you. After you ask if you could buy a 10-30 dollar case online, they might tell you to buy it in a store because you could have your identity stolen by a hacker if you give any information online about your credit card. They might even tell you to not give any family/address/personal information on the internet for the same reason. Some kids think that those reasons are stupid, and if you do put some thought into those reasons, yea, it kind of stupid. But always remember that any reason that your parents give is reasonable. I know this because I've gone through this not so long ago. Some happened very recently. And some are happening right now. I can't get a phone case on eBay because my mom doesn't have credit, also because my dad doesn't give any information away. I can't get a 12th birthday party or any Christmas presents from my parents because they used a lot of money on a trip for not even my full family to Canada until the 4th of January. I know that my parents are trying to make themselves happy but sometimes, I think that they didn't think about me or my twin sister when they planned the trip because the fact we can't spend a Christmas getting gifts and playing with my cousins and we can't spend a birthday with the newest members in my group of many friends. They say that Canada is the gift that my sister and I get for Christmas and my birthday. I envy my brother. He was able to celebrate his birthday and get something from my parents. He's able to buy anything that he wants online or in a store because he has his own credit card. He's able provide everything for himself because he has his own paying job. He has allowance from my mom. He was never distrusted by my parents. He is the child that made my parents most proud of because he got into the best college in California. He always is and always will be the better child because unlike him, my sister and I went to a public school at an early age and we got influenced through that. It was never what we watched on TV or on YouTube because if we just had a different environment with better kids that we went to school with, we maybe shouldn't even know what YouTube was until now. We wouldn't have found out how to steal from our parents if we didn't have any games to play with at such a young age. If only we were raised like how he was and went to the same schools with the same type of people as the ones that he grew up with, both me and my sister might've had the same amount of love from our parents as our brother. We also might not always be compared to my parents when they were kids or even my brother when he was my age. But even thru all of that stuff, I still can't tell if my parents love me and my sister as much as they love my brother. I might not ever find out the answer to that at all. But I know that thru all of my naturally broken self, I will always find a place in my heart to love them all throughout the madness in heart.