HAYWIRE // INSTAGRAM - NEXT GEN

// thirty six //

private messages

> AL
> TEDDY
> LYS
> LOUIS

JAMIE

hey teddy

TEDDY

jamie i'm literally just upstairs

JAMIE

i'm gonna do this over text because i don't know if i have the courage to do it in person

TEDDY

jamie what

what is it

are you okay

JAMIE

yeah i'm fine

just nervous is all

TEDDY

nervous about what

i'm here if you need me jamie

i'm always here for you

JAMIE

i actually have to tell you something

the only other person who knows is al because he helped me out with it all

TEDDY

okay

JAMIE

i don't know if i can do this

i'm sorry i ever said anything

ignore me please

TEDDY

jamie

come back please

just take deep breaths for me yeah?

you can come upstairs to our room if you want

JAMIE

yeah yeah okay

i'll do that

i'm coming up

///

teddy was slouching on their bed when he heard footsteps padding up the stairs before tentative knock came from the door.

"jamie, this is your room too, you can come in without knocking you know." he laughed and jamie opened the door, shutting it slowly and carefully behind him. but teddy's chuckles soon died down as he took into account jamie's red, sore eyes.

"oh my god, you've been crying, come here." teddy full sat up and patted the area of bed next to him. jamie complied and the two boys were sat opposite each other; jamie's legs tucked under and sitting on his feet, teddy with his own legs crossed.

teddy noticed jamie trying to control his breathing. even though jamie's head had been looking downward ever since he sat on their bed, teddy could tell he was screwing his eyes shut.

"what is it? you can tell me anything, j." teddy reached out and grabbed jamie's hand, giving it a squeeze and jamie finally looked up.

"i just feel so silly, teds. you know. i'm making such a big deal out of nothing." jamie finally said, his voice wavering with every word he spoke. tears threatened to spill out of his eyes.

teddy placed the palm of his other hand on jamie's cheek and titled his bed upwards. teddy noticed all the pain and conflict in jamie's eyes in the way they kept darting around the room, refusing to meet teddy's own.

"hey," he whispered, for shouting seemed far too inappropriate for a situation like this. "if it's making you cry, then it's not silly, it's not nothing."

as teddy spoke, he rubbed jamie's cheek with his thumb, back and forth. he was still holding onto his hand, squeezing it again in reassurance. jamie finally stopped looking everywhere but teddy and their eyes met.

"i think- well, not think because i definitely know this... i'm, uh- i'm pansexual." jamie glanced away as soon as those words finished leaving his mouth.

teddy's response wasn't immediate and a sudden sob forced its way out of jamie's mouth and jamie looked embarrassed for letting it do so.

"oh, jamie. it's okay, you don't have to cry." teddy uncrossed his legs and moved closer to jamie. "i'm proud of you. so fucking proud of you for coming out to me."

he wrapped his free arm around the younger boy, pulling him closer. jamie's head settled in the crook between teddy's neck and shoulder, his glasses askew and pushed up off his eyes. teddy reached up with the free hand (the one not holding jamie's hand) and took them off, putting them down next to him on the bed. letting his hand settle in jamie's hair, teddy began to softly stroke it.

"thank you, teddy." jamie held onto teddy as if his life depended on it.

the grip on teddy's hand tightened until teddy was pretty sure that he'd lost all blood circulation there. but he didn't care, because it was jamie who was doing it. and honestly, teddy would've let jamie get away with anything.

"hey, i would've never got mad, you know i'm bi. i'm really proud of you, jamie."

"yeah."

they stayed hugging each other for while in a comfortable silence until jamie's voice broke it.

"i'm gonna head back down once i've chilled out a bit, i think. al wants lorcan to take a photo of him for instagram and i want to see how it turns out."

jamie stayed in teddy's hold, and teddy was thankful because he really didn't want to let go.

"okay, j."

but for now they clung onto one another, not a thought in the world for anyone else.

///

ya fave hoe got her gcse results today ayeeeeeeeeeeee
going to the beach to celebrate