How It All Started

Chapter 24- The Family Reunion

The way Shanes' face looks so pained after I finish telling him that, he holds me tighter.

"It's all because of me that she has cancer," I mumble and he shakes his head no.

"It's not they brought that on themselves," Shane tells me. "You can't blame yourself, she was responsible for her actions,"

"But she was stressed over me!" The way I almost scream that at him makes me hurt even more. "I'm so sorry," I place my head in the crook of his neck again.

He tells me over and over that its okay. But I know it's really not.

I finally stopped crying, and Shane held my hand as we go up the stairs. He takes off his shirt and hands it to me. I decided to just strip right there. He closes the door behind me, I crawl into bed, only his t-shirt, after I brush my teeth, and he follows me. He turns the tv on and flips through the channels.

"What did you eat for dinner?" I ask him as I snuggle into his arm that's wrapped around my shoulders.

"I made Kraft Dinner," I chuckle at his food choice.

"You just can't make a full meal without me," I look up into his deep blue eyes, they're looking down at me with amusement.

"I could, I just didn't want to without you," at that he kisses the tip of my nose.

After a couple minutes of silence watching tv, I decided to say something, "we should have everyone over after my soccer game on Monday, like your mom, Chelsea, Marcus, and my parents. Shanelle could make sure she's home and bring Blake, we could make dinner,"

"Sure, if you want I'll tell mom tomorrow," Shane connects his free hand, that isn't around me, with my right hand. His eyes flicker to the pendant that lays on my neck.

"It suits you," he mumbles.

"I love it," I tell him, he smiles and our lips connect.

"I love you," he says as our noses keep brushing.

"I love you,"

___________

This morning I managed to shut my alarm off before it played the music from the speakers, I also managed to escape the tight grip of Shane, as usual.

I'm standing in front of the sink, I've been staring at myself for around five minutes. Thinking, criticizing, judging, almost everything I hate. But I can't seem to stop myself.

'I have stage four liver cancer'

Her words are still haunting me. They probably always will.

'If you weren't here she wouldn't be like this'

My father's loud voice rings over and over in my ears. Both of my parent's voices screaming in my head, I almost want to scream myself.

I barely got any sleep last night, things of the past jumping out at me.

I didn't realize I was crying until sleepy Shane slowly walks in wrapping his arms around my waist and whispers asking me something along the line of 'why are you crying baby.'

My eyes meet the figure it the mirror that's being hugged by her loving boyfriend. My eyes notice how the tears that continually fall is taking away the makeup that covers the dark bags under my eyes.

I reach for my makeup bag, I apply prouder under my eyes. I ran out of concealer at just the wrong time.

"I'm sorry," I whisper to him leaning back into his chest. He nods with his eyebrows furrowed but doesn't ask questions. I turn around and kiss the underside of his neck.