M.O.N.E.Y • viktuuri ✔️

48.| concealer

"i love you," victor said aloud once more, echoing the words he had said to his yuri the night before.

he's not yours.
you threw him away.
you hurt him.

and although victor longed to hear the soft voice say the words had longed to hear, he was almost glad that yuri katsuki was asleep, and couldn't hear a word he was saying.

because victor knew that if his angel heard him say those three words - "i love you" - his angel wouldn't say t back, because yuri katsuki with the soft skin, dark, dark hair, chocolate eyes and delicate face had every right to hate him; he wouldn't love him.

get over yourself, nikiforov.
not everything has to be about you.

victor hated the thought of leaving yuri katsuki at all, even if he was only going to see if chris was still outside in the waiting room with phichit and jj. god, the thought of jj made the muscles in victor's neck go taut.

he's not to blame.
what was the last thing yuri heard you say, again?
"a fucking whore."

victor looked through the glass window of the door leading into yuri's room, and his heart hurt to see him lying there on creased white sheets, delicate face and soft lips still there, bandages up his arms and the scent of bubblegum still around victor.

god, did victor want to hold him in his aching arms.

victor nikiforov made his way down the hospital corridor; he had always hated hospitals. he followed the low murmur of voices towards a room lined with chairs exactly the same as he had sat in all night by yuri's bedside, and could see the familiar faces of chris giacometti and jj leroy sitting on the right hand side of the room, opposite the receptionist with the false nails who was talking too loudly on the phone to someone who was clearly not a client.

victor could see phichit sitting on the chair next to chris, ripping apart a pink plastic cup - one of the flimsy cups from near the water station - knees drawn to his chest. when he caught sight of victor, with tousled silver hair and red-rimmed blue eyes, as if having only woken up from chris's party weeks before on the comedown, he discarded the cup and hurried over, catching both chris and jj's attention.

"how is he? is he awake yet? can i go and see him?" phichit gushed to victor like a little child, caramel eyes wide with worry. victor shook his head, and went back over the the line of blue chairs jj and chris were sitting in and slumped down, rubbing his face with his hands.

"h-how is he?" jj asked anxiously, and victor felt the anger that had been forced down by panic at the sight of yuri lying motionless in ripped jeans spark up again.

it's your fault.
not his.
yours.

victor said nothing in reply to jj, but looked up at phichit and chris.

"he's asleep," he said simply, raking his nails up and down his legs. "he's going to be ok, phichit. he's going to be ok."

phichit smiled tearfully, starting to bite at his thumbnail and mess around with his shoes against the linoleum. victor shivered at the sound.

"are you ok?" chris asked, and victor nodded. he opened his mouth to say something - he didn't know what, but he was thinking of yuri's soft hair and the feel of it beneath his fingers - but his attention was caught by a man in an expensive looking suit who had just entered the crowded waiting room. the man clicked his fingers at phichit, and waved him over angrily.

"phichit," the man hissed, pulling phichit by the arm towards the bathroom with hisses of "why are you still here?" and "you should have called me sooner." victor watched this man in. the flashy suit murmur to phichit outside the door of the bathroom, next to the oblivious receptionist with the false nails, before letting phichit's arm go roughly and leaning up to ask the receptionist "excuse me, honey, but which room is a certain yuri katsuki in?"

and victor didn't know why, but he left jj and chris on their plastic seats and phichit outside the bathroom door, and followed this man down past the water station and other doors with their small glass windows towards the room where his yuri was lying asleep.

the man in the expensive suit pushed open the door with a thud, and victor, close behind, now saw that his yuri was awake, and saw his big brown eyes widen at the sight of the man in the blue suit, who spat,

"well what the fuck were you playing at this time, yuri? get your clothes, we're fucking going."

"celestino - "

"move."