A Mob Boss's Territory (Book 4-About Vincenzo)

53. Self Discovery

Vincenzo asked hesitantly "His nightmares? Are they about my grandpa?"

O'Neil said "No son. They are not about your grandpa. Your grandpa is the nightmare."

Vincenzo hesitated in talking as he thought hard.

O'Neil said "You are faced with a tough task but unlike what you believe it is not an impossible task. If I asked you to ask your mother something you will find it easier. Mothers are more open. You don't need to go hunting around for information when you want to know about your mother... You told my daughter you went to church and listened to your mother's confessions... She didn't try to stop you from getting to know her true intentions... Mothers are different. Your father has to put up a show. He is a father and a business man involved in organised crime so he has to maintain the exterior to survive in this climate. He has to be a shield for his family so the bullets don't hit anyone else but himself. When it rains he has to be like a cover over his family acting as a roof, a shelter. So his family don't even realise it's raining outside and the lightening striking him.  Normally mothers take the hits too and have to be the shield in any marriage in any typical family. So the pressure is shared. But your father won't allow it and can't allow it in his marriage. He won't share his duties with your mother... He takes on the world alone... All alone... While doing that ... He is not allowed to mourn the past that he has missed out on ... He is not allowed to mourn the life he could have lived ... Your grandpa is the reason for your father's grief... Your father every day is grieving the loss of sacred part of his life that he has lost and he will never get back. Wake up and see the truth that's right in front of you Vincenzo. Your grandpa ripped your father's life apart. He ripped up all his dreams and plans. He replaced it with his own. Your father now never even lets you grasp the meaning of having no choice: you choose your path unlike your father... Your father could live a life he wanted but it was denied from him... He made sure you have choices so your life is not ruined by your father. Instead you have an enemy called the society who can dash your dreams unless you fight hard like your life depends on it. You have that reassurance that your father won't ever be an obstacle standing between you and your dreams. But the society can be... Including me... My daughter turns 17 in July... We have a few months left... You turn eighteen in August like Tristan... The law says you need my permission if you want to marry my daughter. So I am society. Make no mistake. I will be a huge obstacle you can't lift that easily. You will need your father if you wish to have any chance to overcome me..."

Vincenzo was taken back "Sir, I ..."

O'Neil said "Don't deny it. I will confront you later. Now is not the time to talk about your future plans. I am tempted to confront you on planning such outrage and proposing to my daughter on your eighteenth birthday but I will save that later. I am a parent. It's my duty to know what you are upto that involved my daughter. I am watching you.... Have no doubt..." He then pointed to the door "Look at that door. I am going to walk out of it. I am going to try to get your father for you... He will walk in and you will not leave this room until you get answers. Your father doesn't give second chances to anyone. But he gives you a million chances if you need it. You must hear the truth from him and find out what secrets he is harbouring in his heart. If he refuses I will be disappointed ... in you. You must try hard ... You can only get to know your father by talking to him and thinking of his actions and decisions.

He then without another word left. He was fast at disappearing... just as he left, Costanzo heard footsteps outside. He knew it couldn't be his father. He knew his footsteps. This would have been too quick. O'Neil had to go outside to get his father. His father was waiting outside and Vincenzo coming out would have been signal for his father to come in.

It was his uncle Costanzo who slowly came in.

Vincenzo raised an eyebrow "Uncle..."

Costanzo came in and closed the door. He seemed tired and sleep deprived. He gave Vincenzo a pained smile "Are you Alright? My father didn't hurt you. Did he?"

Vincenzo was surprised "Why are you concerned about my safety? My grandpa is locked up..."

Costanzo walked slowly to him "It doesn't matter if he is a captive. Even in that state he can do a lot of damage. Psychological damage. He is not like anyone else..."

Vincenzo remained silent.

Costanzo sat on a sofa and signalled for Vincenzo to sit in front of him "Come Sit. I need to talk to you..."

Vincenzo walked towards him "A lot of people need to talk to me... I haven't been a good son to my father..."

Costanzo shook his head "You haven't been a bad son. You have been a curious and adventurous son... Just what your father wished for you to be..."

As Vincenzo sat down on a sofa next to his uncle, he found his uncle's hand squeezing his as his uncle Costanzo leaned forward and sat on the edge of the sofa "Vincenzo ... In order for you to know yourself you need to know others. You need to see yourself through the eyes of others... Your father is very good at that. He is attentive. He pays attention to who says what and does what... You may think he is like that because he is boss. But it's not just business. It's much more than that... Your father cares and shows how he cares for them in ways the person won't even realise. Do you know what your father did for me when I was lost?"

Vincenzo shook his head.

Costanzo said "He made me realise my mistakes. He showed me the way to be happy. He stopped me from making a big mistake. He made me choose to marry your auntie amaranta. I didn't want to marry. I was never ready. Now I am the happiest I could have been. He made decisions I always questioned. But his decisions make sense to me now and I thank him for it. I heard from Emanuel that you are now in a path of self discovery and this is a critical stage for you. I just came to say good luck... Just have faith that you can be a man like he is one day. I have faith in you Vincenzo. You are your father's son..."