I Was The Rain, She Was The Rainbow

Chapter 3

  It was the middle of the night, and I couldn't sleep.
  It's not like I had a bad dream or anything, but I was thinking. Thinking about Taylor.
  Even though I'd had a crush on her for a while, I started thinking about her even more recently.
  Tomorrow was Friday, the last day of the week. Mom would be out of town this weekend, going bar hopping with her friends in another town. I was planning on inviting Taylor over while Mom was away. I've always tried to keep her away from my mother. I've told her everything about Mom, but I never want Taylor around her in case she hurts her. I don't want to risk putting Tay through that.
  I want to tell Taylor everything. About how her existence is the only reason I'm alive. About her presence changing my whole day. About how I truly want to be with her. About how I love her.
But what if she hates you?
  What if she doesn't feel the same way?
  What if she never wants to see me again?
  I couldn't think about that. It would kill me.
I lay there. I just lay there, staring at the ceiling. The paint on the walls, pastel pink and chipping away. I remembered when it was new. We had just moved here when I was five. I recalled seeing the walls and jumping for joy. I'd put little drawings of ponies and princesses and mystical castles around. I'd had a pink bedspread that I saved up over months of allowance. I used to get allowance before that money started going towards booze. That place was my safe haven. Where I could go when mommy was sad and daddy was yelling at her. I played with the barbies, drew more diy posters. Ah, childhood.
  When I was 13, I started to change it. I kept the walls, and changed the decor with what little money I had. Eventually it became what I have now. Grey bedding, not nearly as nice as the pink. A simple lamp on an end table, and a desk for homework by the window.
  It's not much, since I spend most of what I have on clothes. I can get away with taking $20 or so every week from moms purse. She's so drunk normally, when she's sober she thinks she just spent it on liquor. Stupid bitch.
  I realized that I wasn't going to sleep any time soon, so I took my phone off the charger. My most prized possession. It took my forever to save up for it.
  I turned it on, momentarily blinding myself. I quickly turned down the brightness and opened Instagram. I scrolled through posts and memes in my recommended.
  I flipped from app to app for a bit, then checked the time. 3:19. Ugh. I was so bored. Then, I had an idea.
  I got out of bed and  turned on the lamp as I walked over to my desk. I took out a piece of paper and a pen. I stated  the date at the top, continuing to write the thing that's been on my mind the most recently. Taylor. I poured out my heart, saying how much I loved her.
It went like this...

                                                        5/26/17
  Dear Taylor,
  I never thought in my life that I would be writing a letter to you like this. You'll probably never even read this. But I don't care.
  I wanted to tell you one thing that's been on my mind since day one. How deeply I'm in love with you.
  I know that love is just an emotion our brain feels, and at the end of the day it doesn't matter because one day the world will end and no one will remember anything about the human race and any love ever felt won't matter for shit. But, Taylor Johnson, I am madly in love with you.
You don't give a fuck about my mom, or where I come from, or how much money I have, or that I'm bi. You're still friends with me no matter any of that bullshit. And I can't even express how amazing a human you are for that.
Taylor, what I want most in the world is to walk down the street holding your hand. I want to take you on a date to the movies, to a restaurant, to the park, anywhere as long as I'm with you. I want to see you first thing when I wake up in the morning and last thing when I go to sleep. And more than all, I want to kiss you. I want to feel your lips on mine and not focus on what a shitty world this is.
Taylor Johnson, I am in love with you.
~Jessica Miller

I folded up the letter and put it in the top drawer of my desk, along with the pen. In that letter, I said everything I meant that could be put into words.
I walked over to my bed, turned off my lamp, crawled under the sheets, and drifted off to sleep at 4:47 a.m.

A/N: 861 words! Not bad. Not bad at all. In this chapter, you get a glimpse at Jessica's room, childhood, and her love for Taylor. That's a lot! Hopefully I'm not rushing things! Please let me know if I am and also your thoughts on the story so far. As always, IM OWT!