Eleanor Snape- Book 5, Part 2

"Miracle"

"Alright." Lucius looked back at me. "I will come back later." He leaned over to kiss my forhead, but I jerked away. I didn't want touched. Now was no time to show affection. He looked at me a moment, then stood up straight. I wimpered. "I'll be right back." He repeated. "I promise."

"He walked away, looked back at me one last time, The Disapparated. I slid down and closed my eyes. My hips hurt so bad. Everything hurt so badly. 

Narcissa came over to me and pulled up a chair to sit beside the bed. She stroked my cheek, making me stiffen.

"I'm so sorry, Elle. I know you were really excited." She took a hanky from her pocket and wiped my tears.

"W-was it a boy or a girl?" I wispered. A chill went up my spin, making me shiver. Narcissa looked down for a couple moments, before looking back up.

"A girl." Her chin began to quiver, and her voice sounded strained; she was going to cry. 

I covered my face, breaking down. That made it real. The baby was a girl, or would have been. My sweet, beautiful baby girl. My beautiful baby that didn't ahve a chance because I loved it and everything I loved died. I was a jinx. This never was suppose to happen. It was just a baby. It didn't even live .IT never did anything to deserve that . Her life was over before she even had a chance to live it. All because of me.

All because of me and my stupid body. 

Narcissa watched me cry, then strated crying herself. She moved to teh bed, then wrapped her arms around me. 

We cried together: We sobbed. 

My body took Narcissa's grandchild away. Her granddaughter. 

A thousand thoughts at once all bounced around my head, like a bouncing ball in a tiny space. They echoed like an empty stage. 

An empty room.

An empty nursery. 

Empty hopes.

Empty craddles.

Empty 

Empty

Empty

EMPTY

"Mrs. Malfoy?" The door opened. I didn't take my face out of Narcissa's neck. She looked up.

"Yes?"

"How is she?" Healer Phillips walked over to use and stopped at the bedside. I ignored him and kept sobbing.

Her name would have been Scabior Severus. She would have been blonde, like Draco. Pretty, cute. When she went to Hogwarts, everyone would have liked her. We would have given her eveyrhting she wanted: The childhood I never had. She would have been talented and smart and good at potions, just like her Great Uncle Severus. And....

"I think you know the answer to that." Narcissa dryly said. Healer Phillips was quiet for a moment.

"I'm sorry. I will give you a few days by yourselves. I was just stopping by to give her this." He took a big vial of blue liquid from his pocket and held it out. "But I have to see her take it, just to make sure she did. It's hospital policy. With her history, a fit of hysteria is possible."

"Okay." Narcissa sighed, then turned her attention to me. "Elle, you have to take this." 

And Draco: Poor, poor Draco. He had been so excited to ve having a kid of his own. And Gregory. Sarah Beth was excited, too. She wanted a baby shower....And I had all of those booties I had knitted. All of them going to waste now. Going to waste like the nursery. Going to waste like everything. Like my life. 

Was this even a life? 

I ignored her as these thoughts continued to race. I covered my eyes, getting frusterated. I wanted my mind to clear, and my thoughts to be calm, or atleast come one at a time. 

"Eleanor, please. Take this." Narcissa reached over and took the vial. I leaned off of her, and, with my eyes closed, put my face ontop of her head. I shook my head no a couple times.

"Stooooopppp." I groaned, not realising I was speaking out loud. "Shut up!" 

"Who are you talking to, Mrs. Malfoy?" Healer Phillips calmly asked. I didn't hear him. 

"Stop it!" I cried out.

"Elle?" Narcissa tried. "Elle? Elle!" She finally pulled my head up and my hands away. My eyes snapped open, and all the racing thoughts went away. It was just my own thoughts, one clear, neat message instead of a jumbled mess. I looked at her for a minute or two in relieved confusion, before letting a small, sobbing sound escape from my throat. 

"Can you hear me, Mrs. Malfoy?" Healer Phillips asked. I looked over at him, then slowly nodded my head yes. "Can you be good and take this for me, please?" I continued to stay quiet for a few more seconds, then nodded again, slower than before. 

"Good." Narcissa took the cork out of the vial and held it to my lips. "Come on, drink it up. It will..." She hesitated. "Make you feel better." 

I did as she asked, although I knew that was a lie. Now that my beautiful baby was gone, they were going to start my Combinations regurally again, although I didn't need it. I wasn't crazy. I didn't need it. 

I wasn't crazy.

I began to choke on it, so I spit half of it out. Narcissa gasped, but then got a hold of herself and used the hanky from before to wipe off my chin. I began to sob again.

"It's okay. Shh, look at me, Elle. Just drink the rest of it." She put the vial back to my lips. It took me a wile, but I drank the rest of it. She handed the empty vial back to Healer Phillips.

"Thank you." He nodded. "I will send more tonight, as well as in the morning tommorrow and the rest of the day. You are very hurt, so this brew will make you very tired."

"Okay. Thank you." Narcissa said, but her tone sounded a little annoyed.

"I will come back to check on you later. Goodbye." And Healer Phillips left. 

I cried some more, and then laid down and closed my eyes. After ten minutes or so, my tears and breathing had slowed. Anxiety was still pressing at my chest, but at this point I was too tired to care. I put my head on the pillow, with my eyes closed. 

As I did thiis, I heard Narcissa begin to cry again. I bit my lip, but said nothing. 

She continued for I wasn't sure how long. She was finally interupted by the door opening. I heard footsteps, and the door close.

"Where is Draco?" Narcissa sniffed. Her voice was scratchy from crying.

"He's still at home. I can't get him to come." It was Lucius.

"How is he taking it."

"He's been staring at those bloody sheets for hours now. He's heart broken."

"We all are. But we can't let Elle know. I think she's still in shock. When what has happened really sets in, it's going to hit her hard." 

They thought I was asleep, but I practically was. I was too exhausted to move, but I was still concious enough to listen. 

"I know."

"They've already put her back onto her Combinations." 

"Already? That quick?"

"Yes."

They wer both silent. 

"I just hope Draco will come see her. If he doesn't come soon, it will hurt her even worse." Lucius finally said. 

"I know."

They were quiet again. After some time, Lucius broke the silence again.

"What they need right now is each other." 

"Yes." Narcissa said in agreemet. 

A sob caught in my chest, but I was too tired for it to escape. The pain of the stuck sob and the anxiety combined, making it hard to breath, but I was so under becaues of the Combination I couldn't bring myself to move to fix it.  So instead I just laid there until I fell asleep.