If You Wanted Honesty (Kellic)

Chapter 18

Chapter 18 - Vic - No Different

Maybe I’m hallucinating.

Maybe I’m not thinking straight, too afraid of what Kellin might do to himself now that I’m not constantly around. I wonder if stress can cause hallucinations.

I hope so, because right now I’m standing in Kellin’s yard, staring up at his open bedroom window. I see him kissing someone, but maybe that’s not right. I hope that’s not right.

Then I think, Who am I kidding? It brings me back to reality. I know that what I’m seeing is real. He’s with Oli, and they’re making out behind my back. Maybe they really were having sex yesterday, too.

I can’t stop watching them, but soon I tear my gaze away. I run around the front of the house and drop his sweatshirt at the front door. That was the main reason I came back—he’d left it at my house. Well, it was really more of an excuse to see him. I wanted to see him—but not like this.

It was the same way back in September. I took every chance I could to see him, to make sure he was still alive. And right now, he is very, very alive.

I jump into the car and pull out, trying to ignore the voice in the back of my mind that says, That’s what you get. That’s what you get. That’s exactly what you deserve.

I drive home with that thought still in my head. I slam the front door and make my way up the stairs. “Vic. What’s wrong?” Mom asks, but I don’t answer her. I just escape to my room and lock myself in.

He’s cheating. Kellin’s cheating. Almost anyone at school would say “I told you so”, but I know him. He doesn’t just do that. He can’t just do that. He has to have a reason, and I’m guessing that reason is me.

I lie down and just stare. I thought it was over. I thought we were fixed. Why now? Just when everything was starting to slow down, why now?

—

He tries to speak to me like everything’s okay, and I try my best to act like it is, but I know he can tell that I’m not completely sincere. The ride to school is awkward at best, but I don’t want to talk to him about Oli yet. That’ll be later.

There are some days where you can just tell that something happened. It’s like you can actually smell the gossip in the air or some shit. Today is one of those days. As soon as I walk in, I see people talking and crowding around their laptops to see something. Kellin glances at me and gives me a sly smile, like we’re both in on some secret. Ian passes us and nods at him, giving him the same look and gesturing to the students around us. Kellin nods back before turning down the hallway opposite of the one I’m going down.

What the hell was that about? I wonder as I head to my locker. Since when are they friends, or even allies?

Someone rushes up to me—one of the girls I talked to yesterday. “Vic! Did you see?”

Startled, I take a few steps back. “See what?”

Another girl comes over with a laptop. “It was sabotage. Kellin and that senior guy. Look.”

I try not to laugh at the fact that nobody knows who Oli is and lean over to see what she’s looking at. It’s a video, and though everything is dark at first, soon a light flicks on and someone shoves Kellin inside. Before the door closes, I catch a glimpse of unmistakable hair. Everyone knows who it is.

The girl pauses the video. “I don’t know why Jaime would have something against you two, but…we kind of thought you’d want to know.”

I nod to both of them. “Thanks. Honestly. That…really helped clear some things up.”