Breaking hearts

Chapter three

Katniss POV

My fingers sink into his skin. I start to full on sob. His eyes pop open.

I can't breath. I can't. I feel the tears forming in my eyes but I try to blink them away.
"Katniss!" He tries to say. "What.. doing?" He makes out and tries to pull my hands off his neck.
"I'm saving you!" I cry and push done harder.

It pains me to see him gasping for air like this. But I will not give in.

"Katniss please!" I push him harder into the wall and his eyes are popping out of his head. I will not give in.. "I love you." He makes out. It makes me loosen my grip and think about every time we've kissed. Every special moment.

"I love you too.." I choke out and being to relive pressure from his neck. Then realize that's why I am doing this. I grip harder and push him into the wall. He's gasping for air. He's trying to get me to let go.
I will not give in. 

I must save him. 

His eyes are getting heavy. 

Just a few more seconds.

His finger nails are digging into my hands, making the bleed. He looks at me and then he acts.

I'm on the floor. Hitting my head hard from the kick Peeta inflected on my side. I stand up, dizzy and find him regaining his breathe.  

"I'm sorry." I mumble crying. I dive at him. But he ducks and pins me down to floor. 

"I can't save anyone!" I cry sobbing. I look up at his neck, red but not bruised yet. 

"Shh.. Katniss.. come here." He says with a voice unsteady. He can still speak, which was better then me after I got choked. I give in and I go into his arms. 

"I am sorry Peeta, I just lost it, I don't want anyone hurting you again."

"I know, but I will be alright I promise, just like you will." He says his voice shaking. And we cry ourselves to sleep.

I awake slowly. I take in me surroundings and then the thoughts race into my head. I realize that I have to do some awful things with strangers and I am a virgin, what if they hurt me if I don't know what I am doing?

"Peeta I am a virgin." I say breaking the silence. "What if they whip me or beat me if I don't know what I am doing?"

He looks at me, his blue eyes reflect me in them.

"Unfortunately that might be true." He says looking away. Tears fill my eyes.

"At least they won't hurt you." I say without thinking. He looks up at me.

"No Katniss, I am a virgin."

"Oh sorry, then I guess both of us are in some trouble." I sigh.

"Why wouldn't I be?" He asks confused.

"Well.. Delly likes you.. and you liked her.."

"Katniss, Delly and were just friends."

Then I have a idea, I don't want to lose my virginity to anyone I don't love. I look up at Peeta.

"Peeta we should do it."

"What?" He asks in shock.

"There's no one out there right now." I say pointing to the bars. "It will keep us safe, well as safe as we can be right now."

Before he can respond I kiss him, I cup his face and we kiss into a back corner. 

"Katniss are you sure?" He says in between kisses. I kiss him again and then let go. 

"Yes." I respond and I kiss him again. And with that he unzips the back of my jumpsuit.

And I allow it.

I awake the next morning I find Peeta not there which makes me panic.

"Peeta?" I ask. "Peeta?!?!" I scream.

"You wouldn't find him." Annie whimpers from across the halls.

"Why?"'

"They took him to Snow, we don't know why." Johanna says.

Oh no.

Hours later I am dragged out of my cell again and I come face with Coin. I am sat in front of her. I glare at her. Her gray hair has dry blood enbedded in it. She is gaged and tied to a brown chair. I am handed a gun. I don't know how to use it that well.

"I know what you did." I say with anger. 

Coin has tears in her eyes. I have no pity for her, so when I am told to pull the trigger, I don't resist.

I look at myself in the shattered mirror in my cell. My braid is falling out, what's left of it anyway. Some is completely burned off. My skin is full of burn marks.

I am the shell of the girl I used to be.

A whole day has gone by and Peeta hasn't come back.

I really hope he is dead. But I know this isn't the case, it would a way to easy way out. He wants us to suffer. My suspicions are confirmed when I hear Peeta's screams from down the hallway. I run to the bars.

"LEAVE HIM ALONE!!" I demand. I cry as his screams get louder. I hit my head against the bar and blackout.

The smoke clings to my eyes as I run at her screams. I run as japperjays come at me. I try to follow her screams but it's hard with all the fake voices. I see her, in her reaping outfit standing with Prim in the middle of Snow's front yard as people help the wounded. Gale fires a bomb and Prim explodes. I am blown back I land Peeta's arms, he looks at me and gives me a sad smile as his eyes turn black and he starts to choke me. I try to talk to him but I can't. I look up and see Snow holding the strings to Peeta like a puppet. I pull his hands off my neck and find some scissors and try to cut him free, but it is impossible, the strings are not gonna brake. I scream at Peeta that I love him as he holds a gun to my head.

I awake in my cell for what seems like days later, I stand up and stretching, rubbing my eyes. I go over to the bars and see Johanna drumming her fingers against the cold metal. She looks at me and sighs.

"Nothing ever works out in our favor brainless." She sighs.

"Where is he?"

"He's getting prept for the auction."

"Auction?"

"We are getting sold."

And I feel my heart fall to my feet.