Chapter 1 - "Thoughts and feelings."

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Hollands POV - Sunday Night

It's the second weekend I'm doing the panels alone. I do like it though. It makes the ending of Teen Wolf less miserable. The fans are all so lovely. I wish I could interact with them more often. Talking about all the things our characters have been through and how Lydia has developed so much as a person since the first season. Speaking of the first season. I've been thinking a lot about work the first couple of months we were shooting, how I met everyone and stuff - especially how I met Dylan.

All this talk about Stydia is making me miss him, even more than usual. We did our last scene together weeks ago.. actually, is it months? Wow. I know I shouldn't be missing him or even be allowed to feel this way. If the Stydia fans knew I felt this way about him they would go balistic. I'm laughing as I am imagining how everyones reactions would be.

The hotel room here is nice. It's cold because of the aircondition, but that's usually how I like it. I know Ian is a couple of doors down the hall, also wondering what to order from the room-service menu. It's been a long day, but it's been a good day. I took a nap earlier, so I'm still under the sheets with only my shorts on. I don't like sleeping with any clothing over my hips.

I move my finger over all the meals on the menu, wondering what to get

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I move my finger over all the meals on the menu, wondering what to get. I see a simple chicken salad between all the steaks and soups and immediately decide to get the salad. I find the phone and start dialing the number while fumbling around the room trying to look for a shirt at the same time. The woman answering on the other side of the phone sounded Australian and was overly polite to me. I order my salad and hung up.

I find my t-shirt and put it on. I sit back down on the bed and let myself fall back on it, staring at the ceiling. I'm wondering what Dylan is up to right now. He must be so busy, probably shooting all night. I tried coming up with a good reason to go visit him, but every reason just concludes with me simply just wanting to see him. And that can't be it. Not right now.

Dylans POV - Sunday Night

Work. That's all I'm doing now. That's all on my mind. I know it's coming to an end soon at least. I mean, I love working. It's just been a whole lot of stress lately. And to top it off, I also had a huge fight with Britt. I think it's over this time. Really over. We usually figure it out, but it doesn't feel right anymore. As much as I do love her, I really want her to be happy. And she is not happy with me. I am barely around her anymore and the intimacy has just vanished between us. If we do meet up again, all we do is watch TV or read scripts. Kind of like I'm doing right now... in my trailer. Only it's very lonely in here.

I can't read this scene anymore, I've gone over it so many times it almost feels weird

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I can't read this scene anymore, I've gone over it so many times it almost feels weird. Usually that means I need a break and make myself some tea. Wich is the only thing I have in this trailer right now. I get up and put the water boiler on. I stretch my arms to the side, feeling a relief after sitting on the hard sofa-bed too long.

I open the cupboard to find all my travel mugs all placed together perfectly. It must have been my assistant who did that. I looked at them, not knowing which to choose. I moved some of them aside to look at the others in the back and spotted one with a huge H on it. Holland, of course. She gave it to me. With her own big letter on it. I smile a little, remembering how she said "It was too tempting to just give you a mug with my own name on it, sorry babe!" and then she kissed my cheek. I feel myself getting flushed thinking of it. She's the best. The boiler makes an awful noise, signalising it's done and I pick up the H mug and starts pouring the water in it.

I wish I still was at the Teen Wolf set doing scenes with her, I really miss her

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I wish I still was at the Teen Wolf set doing scenes with her, I really miss her. And I'm going to miss Teen Wolf. It all went over so fast. How weird is it that after all this time, we'd be doing intimate scenes together, as our characters became girlfriend and boyfriend and it actually felt sort of... nice? I mean, it's kind of weird because of all the cameras and crew around us. But why does feel so good being close to her? I take a sip of my tea and lean my back to the kitchen counter. Do I have feelings for her? After all this time being friends?

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