Eleanor Snape- Book 5, Part 2

A Talk By the Lake

It all clicked: A mother was a mother. I didn't matter if they were Half-Blood or Mud-Blood or even Pure-Blood: a mother was going to do what ever they could for their child...

"Are you okay, Elle?" Lucius asked. I hadn't noticed I had began sobbing. I sat up from him. 

"Yes... no... I don't know!" I covered my face. I was so confused. I didn't know how to feel. I had this sudden love for my mother for saving my life, yet, I still had this hatered for her that had been there for ever. It was so confusing. Too confusing for me. 

"It's okay. Calm down." He forced my hands way from teh face, forcing me to look at him. "Try to breath before you give yourself an anxiety attack." He wrapped his arms around me. I tried to push them off.

"Please, let go of me..." I quietly said. My hands quivered to hit him off, but I knew I had to keep myself in control. I had to prove to him that I could keep myself in order for the baby. 

"I'm sorry." He replied, letting to. I laid onto my back and closed my eyes, trying to get a hold on my breathing...

But it didn't work. As much as I didn't want it to, it didn't work. My ability to breath slipped from me, and I found myself hyperventelating. 

The next thing I knew, I was in my bed, shakily holding a cup of tea. 

"There we go, Elle. Nice, even breaths." I followed his instructions. Soon enough, I was feeling good enough to breath normily. I put the cup of tea to the side. "Now, what was all that about?"

"I... I don't want to talk about it..." I wiped my face off.

"Very well. I am sorry I upset you." 

"I... " I swollowed. I suddenly had the overwhelming wanting for my husband. He never would have said anything like that. He wouldn't have made me upset. Draco understood more than Lucius did. Why did I ever want to see Lucius that badly, anyway? I should have known he would just say something terrible about the baby again. "Draco..." I finally got out.

"You want Draco?"

"Uh-huh..." I looked down. He thought a moment, then sighed.

"Alright. I'll Floo him Just try to relax." He instruced. "Can I leave the room?" I bit my lip.

"Can... can you hand me Melvin?... before you go?"

"Oh course." He pulled the stuffed Dragon off of the shelf beside my bed and handed it to me. I quickly hugged it and slid down farhter in the bed. "I will be right back." He assured, and then left the room. 

I rolled onto my side, going into deep thought.

I was feeling s o confused lately. I didn't know how to handle it. I guess crying was better than punching. But what if Lucius was right? I didn't wnat him to be right, but there was some truth to what he was saying. What if I was too unstable to handle a baby? What if I got mad and hit it? 

I never thought I would do that, but I thought that maybe I could of kept myself from having that anxiety attack as well... 

Everything was so uncertain that I began to cry again, but softly. 

"Elle?" 

I liefted my head and looked towards the door. Draco was coming towards me. "

"Draco..." I quietly said. He sat down beside me.

"What's wrong?"

"I... I'm just really confused." I asnwered. I did't know what else to say, or how else to describe it.

"Oh... Do you want me to lay down with you?"

"Yeah... I think I would like that..." I scooted over to let him in. He slipped under the blankets, and I cuddled against him. For some reason, the closed in feeling didn't feel as bad against him as it did against anyone else. 

"Did Dad say something else to you? Is that what made you upset?" He asked. I considered my answer.

"No." I lied. Even though Lucius had, I didn't want him to take the blame. 

"Are you just having a bad day?"

"Yes." I lied again. He nodded his head. 

"I'm sorry. I love you." He almost wispered, right up against my ear. This made a smile break across my face. He slid his hand around me, putting him palm against my stomach. "And I'm excited for our kid."

"Me too..." I slipped my hand over his. He kissed as close to my cheek as he could from behind me.

"Then that's all that matters." He strugged. I relaxeda bit: I guess he was right.