The Escape Route

Chapter one.

"If I were a yellow unicorn, my name would be Hilary McMuffin" Stella stated randomly, taking a small sip of her water that tasted more like aluminium than Italian mountain springs. She typed furiously at her phone "Simmonds, you're up" we all knew what this meant. There was a poor soul in this school that was upset and needed cheering up. Harmony's job was a very demanding 24hour one.

Harmony nodded making her wild curly hair fall into her face "Who? Where?"

"Melanie Brown is crying hysterically on the bleachers with Saaraah"

We cringed "Saaraah...oh dear" she started to pack her things away. You see, Saaraah, even though she was a kind hearted girl that tried to help she was known to make situations worse than they originally were "Sorry, guys, I gotta bounce"

We nodded in understanding "It's alright. We're here to help right?" I said.

She agreed absentmindedly leaving us to finish our lunch.

"Eva!" a deep male voice called, by my nick name that some people in this school gave me, from behind.

I turned slightly to catch slight of River Fitzpatrick waving at me, I gave a warm smile and waved back as he started towards me "Hi, Stella, Cherry" he nodded in greeting at them before turning to me and sitting in Harmony's now vacant seat "Hi, I was wondering if you wanted to stay over mine tonight because, you know, my parents are away again and Hilly's on vacation for the week" Hilly was River's maid and nanny, basically his mother "You can say no"

I shook my head dismissively "Now why would I say no to you, River?" I pinched his pink-tinted cheeks "How could I say no to such a cute baby face?" I cooed in a mocking baby voice.

He slapped my hands away looking at the white school floor "Thanks"

I nodded laughing at his embarrassment before pushing him away "Let's go now. Lunch is almost finished and if I'm not mistaken we have P.E on the other side of this goggle-damned school"

"You're right, lady Blair" he got up holding a hand out to help me up out of the seat. You see, (I should stop saying that) The 'very' smart person that purchased these stupid pieces of helpful but annoying furniture thought it would be fun to watch people struggle when vacating their seats. In our school the tables in the middle of the lunch hall were round and have some sort of ring round them made for sitting on. The amount of times I have seen people failing to get out of them is uncountable. One of the main reasons why Stella, being the sophisticated woman she is, sat with her long tan legs outside of the traitorous ring of death.

I cringed at the terrible nick name, accepting his hand "Don't call me that, ocean"

"You guys are ridiculous" Cherry mumbled or growled, going to put her rubbish in the waste bin, taking my (unfinished) lunch as well. I parted ways with Stella who seemed more interested in texting Harmony or finding next problems or something. Talk about anti-social.

"What died in her butt?" River asked leading me away from the table of death (as it shall be named from now on) towards the exit of the building by placing a hand gently on the small of my back.

I shrugged "Blood is pouring out of her womb through her vagina onto a sanitary towel making her unable to sneeze safely so she's a little upset. That reminds me, mine should start soon then"

He looks at me in disgust "Gross, Evelyna, gross"

I shrugged again "It's a natural human female process, River. Like the birthing process, it has to happen and it still happens whether you think about it or not"

"I don't wanna think about it, babe" he whispered in my ear. One thing I should have said earlier is that River was a total player, man-whore or slut. Whatever sad, rude and judgemental name you want to call him it was sadly true. I'd rather not go into detail about the sad stories he's used to get girls to have under aged intercourse with him over the past three years he wasn't a virgin.