Conversations with the Light Bearer (Religious Satire)

CHAPTER XI - The Second Coming

CHAPTER XI

THE SECOND COMING

I knocked on the door. By then she was playing "We Are The Champions" by Queen. She wasn't answering. I knocked again. With all that loud music, I wondered if she could actually hear me. Grandma must be somehow deaf if she could sleep with this sort of ruckus every night.

At last, she opened the door, and the music escaped, slapping me right in the face. Dani was wearing an overall pajama, with stripes of vertical white and blue, and a purple fluffy slipper which had a face of a rabbit, or perhaps a dog, though to distinguish it would be rather irrelevant since there are no purple rabbits or dogs. She was still busy drying her hair when she spoke, but with the music on, I couldn't hear anything else besides Freddie Mercury's immaculate voice. I shrugged and she went straight to bed. I closed the door and sat by her study beside her.

As for the room, it was bigger than your average quarters: the bed was queen size, there was space for a mini library on the corner, a large French window beside it, and even had a separate small area for a personal wardrobe and an internal bathroom. Unfortunately, it was all marred by Hello Kitty, with shades of pink and white. The mouthless cat was everywhere. The room proved she was also very untidy, not that I was surprised though, with console controllers, leftover food, books, and more books scattered on the dusty carpet.

"Can I turn this off?" I tried my best for her to hear me, making shapes with my mouth. It was no use; she was reading a book now: The Catcher in the Rye, the goddamn book with the goddamn boy. Somehow, I was seeing a resemblance. A bit frustrated, I pushed the red button on the sound system and the world returned to its silent glory.

"Have you read the book?" she said.

I blinked. "What? That book?"

"No. The one in the bathroom," she said sarcastically. "Yes, this book, dumb-dumb."

I chuckled, then nodded. "Yes, my dear. I have—"

"Then shut up."

I blinked again. Perhaps killing her wouldn't be that difficult, after all. The kid wasn't only rude, she was a downright ass. But I kept my ground, resting my back on the chair, and smirked. She indulged in her reading for about a minute or two as I began to whistle.

"Jeez, mister." She spoke again.

"Yes?"

"Can you tone down a little? I'm trying to read here."

My patience was wearing thin. She had no problem with the loud music before, but now she's getting distracted by a simple whistle? I leaned closer. "Dani, I'm going to tell you something."

Little Jesus kept her stare on the book. "If it's about the ending of the book, I'll kill you. If you want to date my mom, I'll kill you. And if you tell my mom that I told you this, I'll find you, pluck your eyes, and bury you alive."

I swallowed. Was this really the Child of God? Or the Child of the Devil? Though if that was the case, I would have taught her a proper lesson or two. A proper lady should, by no less, act like a proper lady. Not like a monster. "I am not really your new tutor."

She ignored me.

"And neither am I a real teacher at your school."

This one got her turning.

"And you, my dear, are no ordinary child."

And then, she blinked, closed her book with a slam, and stared at me. "I would like you to leave now, Mr. Whoever-you-are."