Prologue

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A knock came at my door. Out of instinct I grab the knife beside me, but then relax when I hear, "It's Racheal."

"Come in," I shouted after unlocking the door.

Rae enters the room with her Grandmother on her heels.

"How are you feeling, dearie?" Grandma asked.

I smiled at her and said, "Fine, Grandma, thank you for asking." She hated being called just, 'Minni' and scolded me for calling her 'Ma'am.' The last time I called her something she didn't like, she hit me on the head with a newspaper. I called her Grandma from then on out...

"Translation: I'm horrible, and crazy old lady, I'm not going to thank you ever so kindly for bring it up," Rae flashed me a smile.

Grandma rolled her eyes and set a cool drink on the table. "I brought you some lemon-aid. My lemon-aid. It should help you feel more like yourself."

I took it; grateful and flashed Grandma another smile.

"You. Look. Exhausted," Rae made herself at home in my little room.

Racheal was my first friend that I made here in Iowa.

"And I am exhausted," I said yawning and taking a sip of the famous lemon-aid of Grandma's. "That's good," I swallowed the cold liquid and it soon rushed down my throat.

"Always is," said the plump old woman with a warm heart.

Rae's phone rang in her back pocket. "Ooh, that's my babe, be right back." I laughed knowing it will be a while when Rae hopped off my bed and headed out the door.

"Dearie," Grandma said breaking the silence that was between us that was making me uncomfortable, "I'm an old woman, but you should know that I don't share gossip."

I looked at her strangely, "Umm, okay?" I waited for her to tell me what she was talking about but she never did so I had to ask. "Grandma, what are you talking about?"

"How long has it been?" She asked hesitantly.

"'Been'...?"

She said pulling up a hair opposite of me, "How long has it been?"

Her face was full of care and compassion, but mine was full confusion. "Since I've been here?" I guessed. "Three months."

She shook her head and sat down. "You know what I mean," she swallowed, "When you came to us, first getting here, you had these eyes. Any woman has those eyes when their heart has been crushed. Tears ran down your face when you spoke of his name from time to time." I froze. "Dimitri?"

I flinched at the sound of his name. "Yes, that was his name." She took my hand as I stared at her, paralyzed.

"You throw up everything you eat, you have horrible headaches, you stomach hurts worse than a man's ever could, and you sleep restlessly."

I leaned forward intrigued in what she was saying and also scared. What she is saying isn't possible, she needs to be explained the situation because that outcome would be impossible. It's impossible....

"How long has it been?" She asked taking my hands in hers.

"Grandma, that's impossible, you don't understand, I'm different from you and Rae... I can't. With who I was with, it's impossible..." I shake my head, "Do you understand? Impossible."

"Did he have surgery?" She asked and I shook my head. "Did you, so young?" I shake my head again. "Then the impossible just became possible, dearie." She asked one more time, "How long has it been?"

I said just above a whisper, "Three months."

She nodded her head and sighed. "Okay... What do you want to do?"

I felt frozen. How could this happen? This isn't possible... I'm not - I can't be. I - I...

"Do you really think...?" My voice failed me.

"Yes," she said smiling at me with judgment free eyes. "I do."

"What do I do?" I whispered in a yelling tone.

"I'll be here, helping you," she said calming me down. "You won't be alone, don't worry. We're family, Rose, we won't let you be alone..." She smiled with encouragement but then it faltered. "Do you want him to know?" I shook my head vigorously, making things become blurry.

My voice was dripping with seriousness, "He can never know. Never."

Grandma shook a finger reminding me, "He has a right-"

"No," I said, snapping her hand out of the air and holding it down so she could she how determined I am. "Never. Like, ever. He can never know about this... What happened between us was..." I didn't want to say mistake, but it was close to it.

"I'll go get the supplies, we have the money," Grandma said when I was about to protest. "Dont try and talk e out of this, I. Bang to be involved in their life, and this is just another way how."

"How can I ever thank you?" My voice was hoarse.

"Family doesn't pay back and say thank you, baby... Don't worry, everything will be fine." I nodded and she pulled me to the bed, having my head rest on her lap as she played with my hair.

"I'm going to be a mother... I'm gonna have a kid," I said the shock slowing turning from fear to fright. Will I be a good mother? I'll be better than my mother, that's for sure... I'll have Rae and Grandma too, everything will be ok.

"Who knows," she laughed, "Maybe more."

For now, in these seconds, me being a mother will be a happy thing, I won't think of all the sleep I'll lose, or the matter that I will have to stop cussing.

"Do you want it to be a boy or girl?"

I bit my lip. "I don't know yet..."

"What's his name?" she asked.

Without hesitation I said, "Damon. If it's a boy."

"And if he's a she?"

I smiled and she pulled through my hair with playful fingers. "If she is going to be a girl... I'll name her Mariah." Grandma wished so many times that she had the name Mariah. I figured it would be suitable since she would definitely be helping raise my child.

'My child'? It. Sounded so weird, me a mom... But, I had a feeling it would come naturally.

I was going to be a mother...

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