White Walls [DIVERGENT]

21. Gone

With his back turned to me, I watch as his shoulders contract. Coming to a stop, Tobias stops in front of his car, hands shoved into his khakis.

Peeking out of his unzipped backpack is the blue dress shirt that's part of his uniform. Clearly, he's changed out of the attire into casual wear—Tobias looks handsome regardless but I love seeing him in Manadlo's uniform.

"I, uh, need to talk to you," I mumble quietly, silently praising how this is the closest that I've been to him since we broke up—even if the distance isn't too close.

Tobias turns around, and I see the shadows cast underneath his eyes, how his posture sags, how it looks as if he hasn't slept in days.

. . . did I do that to him?

Shrugging, he stares at the gravel road, lips puckered into a frown. "Um, now isn't a good time. I got. . . stuff to do."

Stuff.

I want to extend a hand out, to feel his palm against mine, our fingers have woven between each other. Yet, even though my body is alive with electricity at the moment, I can't move an inch.

"Please, it's kind of important." Momentarily wetting his lips, Tobias runs a hand through his hair, that is glazed with sweat and dreamily touseled. God, I want to—

"I thought you said no contact?" He blurts out, finally meeting my eyes. His darkened eyes bore into mine, and I'm surprised at how incredibly angry he looks. Cheeks red, Tobias raises up an eyebrow.

My hands beginning to sweat, I rock back and forth on my ankles. "I-I never said those exact words, Tobias," I reply, trying to register why he looks angry. "I just came to tell you something."

After he doesn't reply, I avert my eyes to the Adidas logo on his burgundy hoodie, remembering the night where I wore it to sleep a few months ago.

I'd replayed this scenario about a dozen times in my head, and never once did I com to the conclusion that he would be bitter towards me.

"Okay, well, I know we left thing off on a rocky note," I begin, trying to unnerve the shakiness in my voice, "but I just wanted to let you know that I don't want you to wait for me."

Despite the rocks collapsing in my ribs, I anxiously observe Tobias' expression. His lips pull into a deeper frown, a wave of confusion passing onto his increasingly pink face.

"What, did you think that I would just sit around waiting for you to say you want me back?" He asks, a sharp edge to his voice that is filled with hatred.

What? I try to respond, but not only does he continue before I can interject, but I don't know what to say.

"That I would sit around idly because my whole world revolved around you?" I never said that! "Because my life is a failure and you think that I can't breathe without you?"

Unable to keep my mouth from falling open, my hands involuntarily fly up. "What the hell i—"

"Guess what, Tris. I don't need you." I feel a burn glazing my eyes, and a lump of air gets stuck in my throat. His expression is plausible with rage, and even though I should clarify, all that I can do is stand still.

Voice getting louder with every sentence, Tobias shakes his head. "I thought I did, but I guess I'm functioning damn fine without you. Is that what you wanted? All that I know is that you don't want to be with me anymore, so why the hell are you here?"

Wow.

I watch painfully as Tobias shuts his eyes, taking several deep breaths. My heartbeat elicits a thundering pounding against my ribcage, audible in my ears.