My Soul to Reap (Archived)

Absentia

I sank back into the seat once we got going, watching as we travelled past the field and went back into the city. I closed my eyes, because even though I was very much awake I had a lot to think about. At this point I was pretty sure that the twins were no longer trying to get me on their side. If anything, I'd somehow made myself their enemy. Which was proving to be a very, very bad thing. I must have dozed off, because all of a sudden the doors slammed and I jolted into a sitting position, scrambling out of the door in an attempt to look like I'd been awake the whole time. Brie looked down at me and just shook her head, striding through the door of the increasingly familiar brick building.

"Oh shush you," I shot following her inside. The day was getting substantially hotter, and even though it was still technically morning I could tell it was going to be a day I'd want to spend inside. Rina followed behind me, apparently so excited that she needed to literally push me in. But when I was fully inside the foyer she slammed the door closed, looking totally panicked.

"What is it?" Brie asked sharply. Rina sighed.

"The police have begun officially investigating Cammie's disappearance," she said, and started up the stairs. I nodded easily and followed, only for the realization to literally hit me. I stopped dead, feeling like someone was setting my skin on fire. Sudden, hot panic washed through me.

"Oh," I said quietly, and Brie said something in another language I assumed was a curse.

"Okay, we can deal with this. I was going to take her to Alpha tonight but we can just..." she said, apparently trying to be calm as she watched me teeter on the verge of a break down.

"My mom'll be looking for me," I squeaked out, and Brie put her hand on my shoulder to steady me.

"My parents are going to be worried sick. They have no idea where I am and they'll think the worst and oh my god how did I never think of this before-" I had to stop and take a breath, and I could feel my chest tightening. "It's been like two days at this point and all they know is that I went to a party and and and-" my breath was coming out in short gasps. Brie's grasp on my shoulder tightened.

"Cammie you're about to have a panic attack here," she said evenly. "You need to breathe." My throat was closing and I didn't think I was going to be able to.

"I can't!" I choked out, breathing heavily and feeling my vision blur. "Oh my god," she helped me to sit on one of the steps, and I was dimly aware of Rina hovering on the sidelines.

"Cammie, Cammie, breath for me," Brie said, tilting my head up so I was looking straight into unnatural eyes. "In and out, slow breaths." I nodded a little, trying to breath again and trying not to focus on anything other than her. Eventually I managed to calm down, after about maybe five minutes of trying. "See, there you go," she said, standing back up. I followed a little slower, trying to make sure that blood didn't rush to my head. I smiled weakly at Rina, who looked thoroughly startled in the doorway. Brie ran up the steps behind me, and Rina walked over to me and put her hand gently on my elbow.

"Come on," she said gently, and I followed her up the stairs. I hated myself for breaking down, but the truth couldn't be ignored now. My parents, the overbearing, well-meaning people who cared about me so much were currently worried sick. And it was all my fault.

The day passed. I showered, ate, tried to compose myself. Brie didn't seem like she owned a tv, which was probably a good thing. I didn't want to see my own face plastered across the news as a missing person. But I was going stir crazy without realizing it, just the knowledge that I couldn't leave enough to make me want to. Finally, somewhere near five, I was about to lose it.

"What's Alpha?" I asked, all three of us spread out across Brie's room.

"First letter of the Greek alphabet. Which is where part of the name "alphabet" comes from." Brie said absently. Rina had made her clean up an hour ago, which she was now only doing halfheartedly. At least the mirror was gone from her closet now.

"That's not what I meant," I sighed. Brie threw something in Rina's general direction, and I didn't even see what it was before Rina deftly avoided it. She sat in a chair we'd unearthed on the other side of the room while I was on the bed. "You mentioned taking me there earlier...?" I tried.

"Ooooh right," Brie said, flopping face first into the bed and making it bounce violently. "Nightclub."

"Um," I said, suddenly alarmed. "Why were we going to a nightclub?" I pushed her over so her face wasn't in the bed anymore and I could actually look at her. "What was that going to accomplish?"

"We've been over this twice now? Because I need to cause some shit. Supernatural hangout, owned by a pack of werewolves. I was going to get the owners on my side." Rin stood up slowly.

"On your side?" she asked slowly, full of accusation.

"Oh come on I've told you my plan already," she huffed, rolling her eyes.

"You've told me that you were going to restore respect for reapers. What side are you talking about?" I looked curiously at Brie, who was staying silent. Her head bowed, and I moved to sit up straighter.

"Brie," Rina said sharply, walking to stand beside the bed. Brie heaved out a sigh.

"I think my tongue slipped there," she said bitterly, and Rina but her hands on her hips. For all the sweetness the girl usually showed, this was something different. She was glaring down at her friend, managing to look absolutely terrifying even with her fashion sense.

"Abrielle." Brie's head snapped up and she glared.

"Don't." She warned. I backed up against the headboard, beginning to get scared. But Brie's composure broke quickly, and she looked down. "I'm getting tired of it, Rina. I've been at this longer than you have." Her voice was heavy with something as old as her.

"It's been deteriorating. The whole damn world is going to shit and we're the ones taking it there." Bitterness. That was the word. Every single thing coming out of her mouth was laced with bitterness.

"There's no leadership anymore. Who runs heaven? Who runs hell? Because as of right now I've got no fucking clue." Her voice started getting louder, and I flinched backwards.

"We're supposed to be getting direct orders from the fates, and they disappeared a few centuries ago! My side, dear Rina, is going to be the one to take charge again." The silence was deafening. But, worst of all, I wasn't thinking about what she'd said. That wasn't what had made my heart sink.

I felt stupid. Stupid and naive and used. Because someone else had told me about sides, and I understood the intent behind that right away. But it had taken so long to see it in Brie. Aryan, who had stood only a few steps away from where we were now, had warned me I'd need to pick sides. That there was a throne.

I stood up. Brie and Rina both watched me, and the unnatural gaze was enough to make me turn and bolt. Before I could register what was happening Brie was blocking the door, face unreadable.

"Get out of the way," I said, but I wasn't angry. I just wanted out. The police seemed insignificant at this point.

"You can't go anywhere," Brie countered, and I recognized the threat this time. She still owned my soul, and as long as that was true it didn't matter what "side" I chose. But I still needed to get out.

"Please." There was another stretch of silence and she moved aside. I flew down the stairs, bursting out into the evening air. It was hot, like I'd thought it would be, more than a little humid. I breathed in deeply, trying to figure out what I was going to do. This was crazy. This was a full-out war, and somehow little human me was getting involved here.

"You've had an eventful couple of days, haven't you?" I sighed, closing my eyes.

"No shit," I muttered. Aryan pushed off the wall, walking to stand beside me. I turned away, too confused about everything to bother trying to hide my expression. He'd been there once before, and that was the first time he'd been on my side. Or tried to be. And here he was, just when I needed someone who would give me answers.

"Let's walk," he said, with surprising gentleness.

"You really haven't lied to me yet have you?" I asked, because he really hadn't. And he'd given me information Brie had just confirmed.

"No, I haven't." He agreed. I nodded, turning to face him.

"Then let's walk."