Ruby Tuesday

Chapter nineteen

    I was marvelling the success of the day when with a small sigh someone sat down beside me, his shoulder bumping into mine. I grinned expecting it to be Jack but faltered when I saw the side of Brian’s face as he stared at almost sadly at the gardens. The sadness in his eye was too much for me to hold so I adverted my gaze straight away.

    I waited for Brian to say something but we just sat together in complete silence while the noise of the party carried on joyously in the faint distance. I felt as though I was inhaling his heavy heart. Without a noise I hesitantly held out my cigarette. He left me hanging for what felt like an age before he took it and I heard him take a deep drag. Sitting there as peacefully as we were I wasn’t sure if I actually liked his company or not. He had such an innocent face but the air around him felt dark and unsettled and I could tell that there was something…disturbed about Brian. In that moment I felt on the brink of spilling my heart out about what happened with Toby.

    Thankfully he spoke up before I could speak, “Your mum’s a dreadful singer.”

    I blinked and listened hard and in the background I could hear a nasty sound so wincing I tried to shake my hearing away from that direction. Poor woman. “Uh I know. I tried to stop her but Angie pulled me back. I swear she was a cat in a past life, she loves playing around with people.”

    I felt Brian’s gaze settle only momentarily on my face before making a soft chuckling sound he stared off into the darkening distance once again. I wondered vaguely where Jack was, he couldn’t have gone far. Brian offered the cigarette back and with a small smile I took it before taking a puff. “Do you love Jack?”

    I smiled as I thought of the beautiful face, blue eyes and floppy brown hair with those unforgettable tantalising lips. Then there was his voice and brains, the jokes he came out with and the way he liked to hold me after we’d made love. “Yes,” my voice came out so softly it was like talking through clouds.

    “I’m not a very nice person,” Brian mumbled and when I looked over at him his head was bent and his shoulders hunched as the sadness overwhelmed his body. I frowned unsure what I should do. Did I put my arm around him? Go find Jack to sort him out? It was naïve but I never thought that rock stars would have problems. I really did believe they were next to the Gods so why would they be anything other than floating on cloud nine in their invincible drug proof ways?

    “I’m sure that’s not true,” I began but he shook his head until I stopped talking. Slowly he took his fancy hat off in a way that was like he suddenly found it all ridiculous and over the top. As if he had come back to reality and realised that he was still wearing his costume.

    “I’m a very bad person, I’m sure Keith or Anita has told you.” He spoke their names bitterly yet I tried my best to remain impartial, trying not to look too keen for information. When he caught me shaking my head he let out a sigh once more and got to his feet and glanced down at his hat before looking at me.

    “I have to go back inside,” he mumbled and for some insane reason I leapt to my feet, reaching a hand out as if I was about to cling to his arm. He smiled thinly at me but he looked exhausted as he turned on his heel and made his way back into the manor.

    I stared after him perplexed until I snapped out of it and flicked my cigarette butt away from me and stooped down to pick his hat up. I wasn’t sure why he had left it down there but I was taking it as a gift anyway. Feeling the peacock feather gently I followed after him to find Angie.

    “Hey,” Angie slurred ferociously as I bounded up to her. She grabbed my shoulder to keep her balance and her face lit up like a supernova when she saw Brian’s hat in my hand. “Who’s the thief now?” She raised her eyebrow before snatching it off of me. “Thanks chick!”