It Hurts

First Harm

I get out of the memory and breath heavily
I wash my face and run out of the bathroom.
I quickly walk and see the squad
"Hey" i say
"Hey Maya,are you Okay?" Riley says worried.
Maya:Yeah why?
Riley:Your face is totally white
Maya:What?
Farkle:Yeah,are you okay?
Maya:Yes , i-im totally fine
Riley:Are you sure peaches,you don't look fine.
Maya:I'm fine Riles
Riley:Should we believe?
Maya:I said i was fine,now lets go
Zay and Maya walks behind the group
Zay:Maya,what happened?
Maya:Nothing.
Zay:Did you..?
Maya:What?
Zay:Do it again?
Maya:Zay get over it,i told you! i stopped it eight years ago.
Zay:Maya you were only seven why would you cut?
Maya:I started when i was five.
Zay:What? (he whisper shouts)
I look down
Zay:Maya... (says sadly)..Why would you?
Maya:I really can't tell you.
Zay:(sighs)Fine.
----at Topanga's----
Zay's Pov
2 days later
~while they're studying~
/after hAnging out at Topanga's for 2 hours/
I couldn't hide it anymore.Knowing what my friend did when she was only five.I was tired and scared hiding something like this.I just wanted everyone to know what she's been through.
Zay:I have to tell you guys something.
I spit out.
Maya:No he doesn't.
Zay:That's right,i don't.
Maya:Thank you!
Zay:But Maya has.
Maya:Uughhh(says loudly)
Riley:What's going on guys?
Maya:Nothing.
Zay:A big thing.
Maya:Zay can't you just forget about that,please?
Zay:Fine,but either you or i'll tell soon.

Maya rushes to the bathroom without letting someone can say anything
••
Maya looks in the mirror.
And remembers another memory..
•••
*the flashback*
Maya's dad takes off his belt and starts hitting Maya with it.
5 year old Maya cries but he doesn't stop.
"Da..ddy..p..please don't h..it..me"
says Maya sobbing.
"SHUT UP YOU RAT"
"Why are you doing this to me"
"Cause i don't like you"says Kermit laughing.
after he stops Maya runs to her room , takes out her tablet and searches"how to hurt yourself"
••
author
i know this is a really emotional part but "how to hurt yourself" sounds stupid but i couldn't find a way to make it sound better so just go with that lol
••
she looks at the videos that came up and finds a video where a girl cuts herself.
She searches for something sharp and finds her dads razor blade.
She copies the video while watching it.
"it hurts" she thinks"but i deserve this"
••
I started breathing heavily again and started shaking.Washroom was spinning and it felt like i was going to throw up.
Then everything went black..