The Battle of the Heart: Teenage Prostitution

(2)The Battle of the Heart: Teenage Prostitution

I awoke at nighttime to find Dusty laying next to me head cocked staring at me. I cuddled closer to him, attempting without words to show how sorry I was. Dusty had been the first person I had made love to, he had been my best friend for 18 years, even though he was a year older he had waited to go to college until I graduated.

Dusty and I had always loved each other, but the love changed and swirled throughout the years, and one day boredom and emotion took over and we made love. My first time I was almost 15 he was 16 and I was spending the night at his house while my dad was out of town to a new doctor, however Dusty's parents weren't home either.

I still remember even though it was almost 3am and I was very sleepy. We had done things before but never had it gone as steamy as it was that night. One second we were watching Nightmare on Elm Street, and I was shivering into him, cuddling. The next he was on top of me kissing me as passionately as I ever had been kissed before.

I made the choice without words as I took my top off, exposing my early mature chest that had been an unwelcome visitor after the 8th grade. Dusty had done the rest and the next I knew he was on top pumping into me with a force that was so painful yet so peaceful I couldn't tell where one emotion ended and the other began.

After that for nearly two years we continued our hormonal rampage until one day that love we shared became once more a friendship love and it stopped. Which is where the next person came in. His name was Wes and I met him at a party, right a after my 17th birthday, a friend had dragged me to. Had I known what going to this party would cause I would have steered clear, however I didn't know and so I went naïvely. Wes was a man and I was a girl. Wes was 24 years old, and I thought I fell in love at first sight, but it was really lust, and I soon realized it was returned.

Wes 'taught' me many things that I had no want to learn of which the main thing was pain. How much a human body can take before it gives way, how much can be turned to passion, how much it can overwhelm the senses and suffocate the mind.

It took six months until Dusty found the bruises I had painstakingly hidden, after that Wes was sent to jail for multiple crimes, apparently he had raped girls before getting to me. After the trial it was easy for me to decide to go to college the furthest away as I possibly could.

Looking now at this Dusty I cuddled to I realized how much the old passionate flare had reignited in my body and found it hard not to take him now. However I doubted Dusty would ever love me again after all I had done, especially the latest event.

"Blae?" Dusty asked awaking me from my thoughts and arousing me even more.

"Yes Dusty?"

"Girl, I wish you would let me save you, and you'd stop trying to save me. I miss you hun. I really truly do, I miss highschool, I miss my bedroom with you in my bed, I miss our times together, and most of all I miss your innocence, even if I took it away first." Then he held me as I let all of his words sink in. He held me as if he were my guardian angel, my protector, my lover. Then when finally it seemed as though neither of us could stay silent any longer he let me go.

I had lived with him here since August when our college had started, and not once had we been this close, my dad's recent death had us both on edge, and the lack of money had done the rest. We still hung out with friends, and some lived next door in our small duplex but nothing felt the same. I was 18 and I had felt alone.

Dusty stood me up as though I were nothing but a piece of cardboard, and then positioned and pulled me into his lap.

"Baby girl, I'm the one who is sorry, this is just like with Wes, I should have noticed sooner."

I cringed at the name but decided not to say anything, how could I tell him that even now I wouldn't quit the job? Couldn't any more because I was too deep, and had somehow become addicted to the loveless fucking I had been doing with older men. IN some sick way it made me feel like I still had a father.

Dusty however had known me forever and knew what my silence meant. He shook me, "No! Stop thinking about that you are not going back to do that again you are done or so help me god Blae, I love you girl! I don't want you more hurt, don't want you to just be another girl that can be fucked! I fucking love you!"

When he said he loved me my heart soared because I knew that love he was talking about was the passionate variety. "I love you too," I whispered softly tear dripping from my eyes. And for the second time I kissed him, this time right on the lips. I didn't care if he pushed me away as long as I got this moment.

Then my work phone rang.

And it rang. I pulled back looked on the floor the guilt was written all over my face. Dusty growled and pushed me off and away as he stormed down the hall.

When I was sure he was gone, I picked it up ignoring the feeling of wrong. "This is Blaise speaking, how can I service you and where?" I asked in a sexy voice forgetting to use a nickname.

"Yeah this is the elevator guy, and I want a trip tonight, I'll pay a grand up front for a night of you." He said in a husky voice.

A grand. I promised myself I would stop after him and find a better job, something different. "Where and when?" I asked using a girly voice now.

"The same building room 1403 and in an hour." he replied

"Okay sugar see you then." I said in a provocative voice, hanging up the phone.

I quickly pushed the contents back into my purse, leaving the empty box of birth control I would have to replace on Monday after school. I got dressed wearing a black number, and no bra with a thong. I applied lip balm and nothing else, and finally as I was about to leave I saw Dusty. He stood in the doorway to his room, puffy eyes and bed head.

"Blaebay," he used the nickname he hadn't said since we were kids, "please?"

"After tonight no more I swear," I said not really believing my own words, then I walked out the front door to the corner to flag down a taxi.

Twenty minutes later I arrived at the same place as earlier in the day, I just hoped to god I wouldn't run into the man from Friday night, he wasn't especially 'nice'. I got in the elevator cringing a little at the memory, and clicked the button. As the floors ticked by I found myself becoming more and more nervous.

First off Dusty was probably hating me right now and he was my closest friend I had here in New York, Ginny coming in at second, and I didn't want to lose either.

I felt as if tonight would be one of mistakes, and almost decided to stop the elevator early, when I realized that I was there, walking slowly to the room. I was 15minutes late but I doubt he would care.

The door opened, and I realized why yes running would have been good, because three very lusty looking guys looked down on me.