Do I even want him to save me anymore? I'm already broken down to the core. Why would he want me? Why would anyone want me?

I don't even know if I've looked at anything else besides this wall for the past few hours. Nothing else caught my attention. Nothing else mattered but this wall.

I closed my eyes again, realizing how everything I'm thinking wasn't making any since. I was loosing myself piece by piece. And I don't know if I or anyone could ever pick it up and fix it. But maybe I didn't want any saving. Maybe I just wanted everything to end already.
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Suddenly the door to the bedroom opened and I shut my eyes tightly and clenched my legs together while soft whimpers left my mouth. I knew it was him. I didn't even have to hear his voice to know it was him. I was just now use to the way he walked and the way he smelt.

The door closed and I flinched, feeling my body tremble all over again. I felt hot tears form in my closed eyes as I remained still on the bed, praying Jackson wasn't coming here to bother me. I just wanted to be left alone to cry.

"I know you're awake Allie." I heard his deep voice come from the other side of the room as I whimpered loudly and felt tears roll down my cheeks. Just his voice alone overpowered my whole body. It terrifies me. I heard a dark chuckle come from him as he made his way towards the bed slowly.

I whimpered even more when I felt the bed dip and I heard him crawl over to me while he breathed louder. "You were so good in bed baby. And that was only your first time." He whispered in my ear as his arm snaked around my stomach and he pulled me towards his chest, making me let out a sob as I felt my insides burn.

I whimpered as his thumb caressed my stomach while he nuzzled his face into my neck, leaving long deep kisses. I didn't do anything to fight back, I just laid there in his grip while trembling like crazy. "I can't wait to do it all over again tomorrow." He whispered in my ear as I flinched and whimpered. "Next time I'll make sure to make it longer. Cuz I know how much you'd enjoy that baby." He smirked as he squeezed my waist, making me jump a bit and whimper loudly.

"My shirt looks great on you." He hummed in my ear before leaving kisses all over my face. His other hand wrapped under neath me, bringing me even closer to him. Both his arms were wrapped around my stomach as he pressed himself against me.

"Does it still hurt?" He asked as one of his hands slowly trailed down to my thigh. I whimpered and let out a pathetic scream as I pulled my leg away, causing him to chuckle amusingly. "I'll take that as a yes." He grinned, placing his hand back on my thigh and rubbing it soothingly.

I laid there trembling uncomfortably as tears ran down my cheeks. He kept leaving kisses all along my neck and collarbone, making me remember the flashbacks even more. I then let out a gasp as he gripped me tightly on the thigh, causing pain to shoot through me. "Jackson- P-please L-let go. I-it hurts." I begged softly.

My voice wasn't strong anymore. It was weak and more feminine. I sounded 5 years younger than myself. I didn't even recognize the voice. I was shocked to know it belonged to me. "You're voice is so gentle babe. I love it." He grinned against my cheek before he removed his hand and brought it back towards my waist.

"I want you to take a shower before you go to bed alright?" He asked, instantly getting a nod from me. "Good girl." He grinned, running his hands down my waist. I whimpered loudly as I allowed him to do that. "Good girl." He purred again, this time in my ear. He then leaned down and kissed my sore lips before he leaned away and held me closer to him.

I just laid there, not able to do anything but allow everything to happen. Because I was simply just too weak to do anything. I was too hurt, too damaged. And having him here made it even worse.

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