beyond the monotonous city

thirteen

"That's nice well I'm glad you like them. Maybe next time it should be your turn to recommend some music." Lauren said.

Camila shook her head. "Nah, I'm not really good at that. Not my thing. I'm the type to listen to the same songs or album over and over until I get tired of it. Or just listen to the most random songs, on shuffle. There is no in between."

To Lauren, it was odd that the girl who loved adventures wasn't as adventurous with her music taste. They talked more about their trip and painting until they decided to just watch another Disney movie downstairs. Camila's request was followed so they ended up watching Beauty and the Beast. The movie was near finished when there was a knock on their door.

Clara answered the door and there were murmurs and Lauren didn't have time to process when she felt arms around her. She took in the familiar scent of Chanel No. 5 and she immediately knew who it was.

"Shaun?!" She separated from the hug to see her best friend, the tall albino, his hair now buzzed short, under a baseball cap. He was wearing a ripped shirt and leather jeans and a leather jacket on.

"Laurrren! I missed you my little Cuban baddie!" He exclaimed hugging her again.

Lauren was filled with so much emotion she felt the happy tears form in her eyes. She noticed Camila sit there looking on and she composed herself.

"Shaun, this is my friend and neighbor Camila. We used to hang out when we were kids." Camila smiled and waved at Shaun who hugged her as well. "This is Shaun one of my best friends, studies design in UCLA."

The two shook hands. Shaun sat beside Lauren, her hands in his. "So what are you up to, Laur. You look really great recently, what are you eating. Or who?" He joked.

Lauren slapped his hand and felt the blood rush to her cheeks. "No one. I just had a good time yesterday, me and Camila went hiking. It was pretty fun."

Shaun looked amused between the two girls. "My, I need to take myself hiking too in order to look this great. How was she?" He addressed Camila.

"Aside from the fact that she almost slipped and fell into the terrain, pretty good." Camila said, Shaun snickering at the comment.

Shaun turned to Camila, "What eyeshadow are you wearing? It looks really good."

"It's called au naturale. I have deep eyelids." Camila said matter of factly. Lauren knew, as she always thought her eyes made her look either more mysterious or more sleepy.

Shaun turned to Lauren amusingly. "I like her already, I'm happy you've made good friends. Laur, you're so deserving. You're doing well in school, Keana told me. I'm the proudest."

They talked for a while until Lauren went to go to the bathroom, leaving the two. When she came back, Camila told her she had to leave.

Camila came up and hugged her. "Thanks for the day Lauren, it was really good. Consider yesterday a check off my bucket list."

"Bye Camila, see you around!" Lauren waved as the girl made her way next door.

When Lauren sat back down, Shaun was looking at her funnily. "Shaun, spit it."

He smiled slyly. "You like her don't you?"

Lauren grabbed his arm and brought him to the dark pantry as she grabbed a tub of ice cream and started eating it with her friend.

"I don't." She said, her face dead serious. Shaun laughed at her expression, pointing at her with the back end of his spoon.

"Sure, you're not bisexual. I know when you're lying, Laur." He said taking a scoop of the dessert.

Lauren sighed. She put her spoon down and put her head on her hands. "Okay fine Shaun. I feel something for her." His face lit up with 'I told you so' but she continued. "I feel something but I don't know what it is. I just feel so strongly for her. I don't want to say it's love because I don't think I'm ready."

"Don't think you're ready because you're not over him?" He asked. That felt like a knife in her back. She felt choked up immediately. She felt like loving Camila would be so selfish after what happened with her and Alex, what they shared. Especially since they just ended so abruptly. Heaven knew she still wasn't over that.

Shaun noticed she looked stifled. His look softened. "Lauren I know it must be really hard. Think of yourself too, Alex wouldn't want you to do this to yourself. He would have wanted you to be happy."

She closed her eyes, thinking of both Alex and Camila, how he still had a huge space in her heart she couldn't let go. They still clouded her judgement and couldn't make her think straight. She looked back at her albino friend.

"Well I don't think I'm ready either 'cause I'm no good for her." She said, feeling her heart grow heavy at her admission.

He raised a finger. "I don't want to hear that. You are just as good as anybody else, I don't care what you think after what happened. You're still Lauren Jauregui. The baddest, the most amazing girl I know, well-aside from Keana."

She shook her head, Shaun didn't get it. "I'm still depressed, Shaun. As far as we're all concerned. I'm not well enough for her, she doesn't deserve someone like me. I could just fuck this all up over again, I don't wish that for anybody else. I don't want to leave people like how Alex left me or my dad left me-" She felt her chest rise up in emotion, her words choke her throat, and her eyes water.

Shaun dropped his spoon and put his hands on her shoulders, making her look at him. "Listen, first of all none of that 'I don't deserve her' bullshit. Nobody gets to decide that, everything is still worth a shot, a second try. Secondly Alex did not leave you by choice, it just happened. Your dad was a coward, whatever you say. You Lauren, you have the choice. This isn't a hit and run thing, you have your whole senior year to decide how you want it to work for you two. I see you like her, then go for it. What do you have to lose? You're one of the most amazing people I know, anyone would be crazy to turn you down."

Lauren sniffed. Shaun's words rattled her and she suddenly felt a sense of comfort wash over her. She smiled at him and he hugged her again. "Thanks Shaun, I needed that. I really miss you."

"One more thing Laur," he went serious again. "Life is very damn short. I want you to make the most out of every minute you've got. Don't live another year, or a lifetime with regrets Laur. I know you've already lived through a year full of them, you don't need that kind of negativity in your life. She makes you this happy see? Do what your heart desires. Go for it." He squished her cheeks to which Lauren smiled.

Lauren put her arms around his waist, burying her face in his chest. "I love you, Shaun."

"I love you too Laur, now you're gonna smell like Chanel No. 5." Lauren laughed at his statement. "Also, I hope that's it 'cause I want to talk to you to this boy I've been trying to flirt with."

Lauren laughed, and spent the entire evening in the company of her best friend catching up to stuff.

--

A/N: And we get a glimpse of more Lauren here. Tell me your thoughts!

-Sofia