beyond the monotonous city

ten

"Your room is nice, I feel like I'm getting to see this side of you." Camila said as she looked at the vinyl collection.

"Just don't play any by bands." Lauren said as she felt Camila would play something. She knew it reminded her so much of Alex and that was the last thing she needed.

Camila put on one of the older vinyls, ones from her mom's generation and heart Cyndi Lauper's voice come on as 80's dance music started to play. Lauren felt herself reluctantly smile at the song choice, her frown being wiped away. She sat up and saw Camila turned on her disco lights and multicolored circles started swirling around the room. "You never told me your room could do this."

Lauren laughed at the other's amusement. Lauren lay back down as Camila lay on the bed alongside her. They just lied there as they watch the lights go around to the tune of Cyndi Lauper. Lauren found herself chuckling again out of the blue. It was hard to hold a grudge against the other girl.

Camila turned to her, "What's so funny?"

Lauren shook her head. "This was so random but it's so amusing." She wanted to be mad at Camila but she couldn't bring herself to wipe off that silly smile on her face.

Lauren turned her head and looked at Camila as she marveled at the lights as they went along with the music. Lauren thought she never saw a smile as pretty and contagious as Camila's. The way her eyes grew smaller when she smiled, and her cheeks showed tugged at Lauren's heartstrings. To Lauren, nothing could make her feel that way in her guts than when Camila smiled.

The smaller girl grabbed her arm at the wrist and she then knew she was wrong. It was even better. She didn't have any clue where these thoughts came from but she didn't have time to process anything. "We did that, Lauren." she said with so much pride and joy in her voice.

She didn't look where Camila was looking and just watched as the girl's face reflected the emotions she felt. She didn't have any clue where these thoughts came from but she didn't have time to process anything. Camila felt her looking and she met her gaze. "Why that look on your face?"

"You look so happy, it's amusing." she said which was partly true. Camila just nodded and continued looking at the ceiling.

Lauren knew this moment all too well. She knew for sure that at this moment, she really appreciated Camila's existence and that was it.

They small talked about the songs that played until the vinyl was finished. When it was done, Lauren was pretty sure it was already dark outside. Camila didn't seem to want to leave though.

"You have good music taste by the way," Camila said playing with the strings in her hoodie. "I saw from your collection."

"Thanks, I used to take pride in it before. Now I guess I have a hoarding problem." Camila laughed at her response which made Lauren smile. "I can lend you some CD's I think you'll like, if you want."

"Yeah that would be great!" Camila just watched her for a few seconds which Lauren didn't mind at all. "I feel like I know you a lot more now, I can see that music is really your passion."

Lauren thought for a while. "It's my passion, but it was almost my death. Music was the reason I was almost killed." It was silent for a few seconds. She didn't want to explain any further and actually waited for Camila to ask why but she didn't.

Camila replied as if the the answer was at the top of her head. "That's exactly what passion is for. It's all consuming and you're left at its mercy. That's the beauty of it."

"What's your passion, Camila?" Lauren tossed the question to her, wanting to know how the other girl thought.

"I live to live my life to the fullest." She said as she got up and stood up from the bed. Lauren sat up, hoping to continue the conversation further. "And that Lauren, is what I wish for you as well."

Lauren realized the way Camila talked baited her. She was a sucker for words, and unknowing to Camila, it was pulling her. "Are you always this pretentious and self-aware? I sometimes feel you aren't real."

Camila stopped at her words, put her hands on her hips. "Only to people I care about."

She made her way out the room and Lauren followed after. Camila stopped at the doorstep, and turned around. "That was nice Lauren, thanks for hearing to what I had to say. And letting me rummage in your room."

Lauren quickly handed her the CD's she grabbed on the way out before Camila could leave. "Goodbye," Lauren found herself calling out as she watched Camila enter the other house across from hers.

Camila was real, and she cared about her. For her then, that was all she knew and that was all that mattered. She closed the door with a smile on her face.

--

A/N: I always have fun writing their conversations, I live for deep and existential talks. Let me know your thoughts!

-Sofia