17. Please Don't Say You Love Me

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Zion leans against the armrest of the couch with his legs on Mike's lap while Mike has his legs on top of the coffee table; his back against the back of the sofa.

"You're beautiful." Mike says as he watches Zion laugh.

It makes Zion stop laughing and his cheeks to redden. He shyly meets Mike's gaze with a small smile on his face.

"Especially when you laugh, smile, I love hearing you laugh. I--"

Zion sees how Mike's gaze intensifies. His smile drops. "Please don't tell me you love me. I'm not going to say it back." Zion whispers, playing with Mike's fingers. Even though I think I do.

"Zion..." Mike says hurt seeping into his voice.

He meets Mike's gaze. "Please."

Mike meets Zion's gaze. I understand why he wouldn't want to hear it, but I want to tell him. He deserves to hear it. I don't know for how long I will be able to keep myself from saying it. He kisses Zion's fingers before he reluctantly says, "Okay."

"I'm sorry." Zion says.

"Don't..." Mike says giving him a hug. "Don't apologize." He whispers. I hope you can trust it one day. He thinks hugging him tighter.

Zion swallows the lump that formed in his throat. I wish I could handle hearing it. But it would change everything. Then, everything would end. He hugs Mike tighter.

Zion shifts so that he is next to Mike. Mike keeps his arm around Zion as they turn back to the movie. Zion pretends to watch the movie, but thoughts whirl around in his head. Mike runs his fingers along Zion's arm.

What is he thinking? Mike wonders. He brings his fingers along Zion's waist and begins to draw circles.

Zion bites his lower lip and swallows.

"What's wrong?" Mike asks as he feels his shirt get wet.

Zion shakes his head.

"Zion." Mike asks as he tries to have Zion look at him.

"It's such a happy ending." Zion replies. Why did I have to take it away from him?

Mike smiles internally. It's one of the things that I love about him. He wipes Zion's tears away before he is capturing his lips in a kiss. He breaks the kiss and smiles at Zion. Zion returns the smile and buries his face against Mike's neck. He kisses Mike's neck. Mike tightens his arms around Zion. They stay like that for a long time.

This is where I want to stay forever. Zion thinks.

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