"Did you talk to him?"
She asked as soon as I told her what happened to Louis' mother. Diana knew it already. But she didn't just mentioned it that day because she didn't want me to worry about it.
She's really right. The news got me worried. I wonder how is Louis now.
I shook my head for a "no" answer to her question.
"Can you talk to him?"
Can I talk to him?
I don't know if I can still talk to him. I haven't talk to him since that day at the beach with Ollie and the girls during our vacation.
He didn't answer for my number and neither did I. I haven't thought of losing contact of him during that time.
"Em? Can you?" She asked again when she never received an answer from me to her question.
"I don't know." I honestly told her. And I can clearly see the sadness on her face and the disappointed expression. "I'm not sure if he's still using his number."
Diana nodded. And there was a silence between the two of us. Just thinking of reality. How hard it is facing a lot of struggles in our life. But I'm lucky I was able to survived.
The two of us just sat silent on the couch. Pretending to be busy. Since Diana's parents are out for groceries. And today is my day off.
But have you ever felt like preferring to have work to avoid thinking about negative things?
I hate it when I don't have anything to do. It makes me think of a lot of things in life. Makes me question a lot of things in reality.
Why do we have to lose someone we love?
Why do we have to feel these?
Why do we have to feel worthless?
Why do we have to feel like we can't do anything?
Why is life so unfair?
I honestly hate that I can't be there for him. That I can't even comfort him and tell him positive things. I hate that we are so far away. And that we can't make things easy.
_ _ _ _ _
Its almost midnight. And no matter how many times I try to close my eyes. I still can't sleep.
There's something bothering me. There's something inside me that doesn't want to end the day without doing something.
I opened my laptop. And load my candy crush. I tried to played it for 5minutes. I found it boring.
So I went to Omegle. Because I thought I need someone I can talk to. And yes, I was able to find a lot of people I can talk to. But all of them are looking forward on me sending them nudes at the end of the conversation. Which I honestly don't like.
So I end up closing my laptop again.
What should I do ?
What should I do ?
YOU ARE READING
CHANCE | Louis Tomlinson
Fanfiction"Everything has change, ever since the last time we spoke. I don't have the guts to do something better for myself. Even everyone noticed it. I can't believe that the man I never expected to come into my life left a huge scar like this to me." "...
