Mark
I was awoken by furious vibrating. I heard a thump, then muffled vibrating. I opened and rubbed my eyes to see that my phone had fallen. Of the nightstand with these notifications. I grab my glasses, put them on, and pick up my phone. I glanced at the time. 5:45 pm. Messages, Facebook messages, snapchats, DM's. There must be at least ten from each app. I open my phone to see the sender.
I put the phone down and shrivel up on the other side of the blanket, gently whimpering and twirling the blanket in between my hands. The phone continues buzzing. It's a call.
Chris.
Whether I built up the courage or lost my mind, I answered.
"Where the fuck have you been?! I've been messaging you in every way I can."
"I'm out," I try to reply calmly and firmly, but my voice comes shaky, my voice cracking. I clear my throat.
"Well get back here, you shithead. You're gonna get hurt. Someone's gonna mistreat you. Come back to me!" I thought about his words. How ironic. This worked on me all the time, and I'd come crawling back. But today, it's almost as if I truly heard his words. 'Someone's gonna mistreat you." How did I not realize he was talking about himself without knowing it? It was so obvious.
"No," my voice a little steadier.
"Excuse me? I said--"
"Oh, don't worry Chris. I heard what you said. Did you hear what I said? No."
"I have given you everything you needed ever since you dropped out of college and decided to pursue a job playing FUCKING VIDEO GAMES. When are you going to get a real job and earn real money? And yet, you think it's okay to just leave me? I put food on the table for both of us. You just sit there at home like a housewife" Ouch. That hurt. There was a pause. "You know what? I'm not even mad anymore. You're going to experience what life is like all on your own."
"Alright. Whatever you say, Chris." I said that last part with a mocking tone. I could just see his red face of anger.
"And you better not be with that other guy. You know what I told you about being with other guys. I won't allow it."
"But I'm on my own now. That means I get to make my own decision. I can date who I want to."
"Alright, that's it. I was gonna give you a little freedom before realizing how fucked up your decision is, but now you've lost your privileges. I'm coming to find you. Where are you!!!"
I hung up the phone, my heart beating fast. I've never been so defiant. I've never put up so much of fight. Especially with Chris.
What was wrong with old me? Why did I always come back to him after a shitty pity talk like that, only to get bruised up again the next couple of weeks?
I blocked his phone number and social media. I blocked his friends that had followed/friended me. I'm sure he set them up to spy on me for him. To make sure I had a tight leash.Why was I so stupid and naīve and oblivious? I hated myself. I don't understand how people can love such an ignorant and shy person like me. I chuckled. Oh, right. Nobody loves me.
Just as that thought passed through my head and registered, Matthias knocked on my door, and before I could answer him, he said, "Hey, sleepyhead. I made us reservations to go to a restaurant for dinner tonight. The reservation is at 6:30."
"You can come in," I say. The doorknob turns, and Matt enters. He sits down on the bed with a puzzled look on his face. "Is something wrong?" I say.
"You look a little sad." I lower my head. He puts his hand under my chin, and raises my head. I stare into his calm blue eyes, him staring back into mine. He keeps his hand there. I bring my hand to caress the right side of his face. He smiles sadly.
"I'm better now," I feign a smile.
