The Duke's Maid & Lover

Chapter 3 -- First Kiss Taken By Stranger

A man snatches the first kiss, pleads for the second, demands the third, takes the fourth, accepts the fifth - and endures all the rest.

-Helen Rowland

***

Chapter — 3 First Kiss Taken By Stranger

"I already sent a letter to my sister. She is a very kind woman. She once cried when we found a little squirrel dead in the little garden my mother used to work on." Martha smiled lost in a memory she has forgotten to visit, shaking her head she continued telling Lillie her relationship with her sister. The letter was written by one of the men who frequented the place. Martha didn't know how to read and write. 

"I was more of the one with the strong stomach. She will find you some kind of job in the house, and from there you could change your status as you earn their trust." Martha said with the little smile of hers.

Lillie spent the rest of the afternoon cleaning and making sure everything is right for Martha to do her job. She made sure to show her gratitude, as she scrubbed the floor and spent the rest of the afternoon washing the dishes that kept pouring rain.

At night, she dreamed of flying into the thin air and never returning back. And for some reason she smiled in her dreams, it was the feeling of comfort even in a situation like this.

For three months, she has lived the life of her maids, and she felt guilty for what she has done and said. Was it this hard? Do they get the back pain too? Or do they not dream at all because of the ache deep in their heart. She wished she knew then.

Maybe she might have been thankful for the things she has received. The gowns, diamonds and the food her family provided. She smiled as she drifted back to sleep. Bound not to remember the conversation she had with herself this night.

The waiting kills the most. The knowledge that your next step is out there and yet you can't just go and have a grab at it. Maybe she should focus on doing something until the news from Martha's sister comes but the cleaning and all the labor work left her lonely with her thought and her thoughts were always of her unknown and unpaved future.

Soon she started to help Martha with anything she could find, and of course, Martha would not allow her to go to the main room, where the "gentlemen" in name as Martha calls them spend their time drinking and gambling.

She has had a little glimpse of the room after her first abrupt appearance, it seems strange to hear the gentlemen talk of woman's body so easily.

She has turned red when the men noticed her standing there, she has come to call upon Martha but the reality was that she felt lonely in the kitchen, alone with a cook who barely exchanges a little polite addressing of his own.   

The need for human comfort provoking her to doubt her state of mind, wanting to compliment on the new gowns someone has been wearing. Being escorted by the groom to a ball. She figured the one thing she missed was human interaction.

Martha has warned her never to come since then, but Lillie was sure she heard some of them ask about her, and Martha has said words that are not proper to be said by a woman.

Damn those rules Martha have said. I am no lady in look or mind. Lillie has been confused then but now she understands Martha is no lady type. She likes to be free, and it is not hard, to be frank if you have the type of job Martha has.

At last Lillie decided to rest for a little bit, but her stomach seems to grumble in protest. With a strong mighty will, she ignored the hunger and went to her little room anyways, she tried to close her eyes but memories that are pushed away started to play themselves.