Trigger Warning//Phan

Chapter 4

Music: Cancer//Twenty One Pilots

Trigger Warning

~~~~~Philips POV~~~~~

I had bandages and what ever else I saw that I thought would help. I walked back towards my room Dan was crying? "Dan why are you crying?" is he really in that much pain? "Its just that this room kinda brings back some memories.." I'm so stupid, of course "Oh my goodness I'm so sorry I shouldn't have brought you back here. You can leave if you want or a different room or if you-" he started laughing "What," I didn't say anything funny... "You still blabber on about things, I kinda miss that." His head dropped once he said the last part. He misses my over talking? Mike would call me annoying and tell me to shut up when I did it.

He looked distant like he was thinking, I walked over to him "Dan, do you still want me to help you with this?" I made sure to speak quietly so I wouldn't scare him. He just nodded in response. I sat next to him but he just stayed facing the wall with a distant look. I lifted up his right arm making sure to only touch the hand part, his head turned towards me and he looked at me I could tell he was still unsure about this. His eyes were red and puffy, and his face was patchy but he still looks cute. Wait. What? I didn't really just think that, it's probably just me feeling bad for him...yeah that's it.

I looked away from him and grabbed the rubbing alcohol and a tissue, so I could clean the cuts and scratches. His eyes looked worried when he saw what I was doing, "This will hurt probably a lot but it will help and you need to clean these," I grabbed his free hand and put in on my knee. "You can can pinch it or grab it when when you feel pain, I deserve it." A flash of confusion crossed his face. "No you don't, it's not your fault." "It is my fault but I want to bandage you up then we can talk if you want to." He only nodded, I took the tissue and applied it to his smaller cuts and bruises near the lower part of his arm. He bit his lip and clenched his jaw.

I moved it around not going past the elbow he didn't have very deep cuts here. He hadn't moved away but he was biting his lip so hard I thought it would bleed or fall off. There are deeper ones higher up on his arms and I know they are going to be painful. I got a new tissue and poured some more rubbing alcohol on it, as soon as it got in contact with a cut he whimpered and pulled away. He had more tears in his eyes, how many times am I going to make him cry? "I know it hurts but this isn't to hurt you, it's to make this better not worse." he was hesitant but he moved back near me, closer this time. I squeezed his hand and he gave me a faint smile

I placed the tissue back on his arm and he swallowed and dug his nails into my knee, it hurt but I knew he was in more pain than me so I didn't ask him to stop. After I finished the arm he was in pain still but I had to do his other arm still. It took me another 15 minutes to finish the left arm and surprisingly he didn't draw blood on my knee. He was crying but not really crying, just tears falling. Without thinking I whipped the tears away with my own jumper sleeve. He smiled and I moved my hand away from his face, I didn't want to though.

"Phil you said we could talk, and I want some explaining because I'm confused..." I knew this was coming "Ask away,"
"Why?"
"Be more specific Dan."
"What did I do that made you want to ditch me?"
"I lied, I never wanted to ditch you but I thought making you mad at me would make it easier for you at least,"

"Hey faggot" that's Mike. He had me pinned up against a locker "I will tell everyone about what happened unless you dump that no good fag friend of yours, got it?" what happened wha- he wouldn't "You won't tell anyone." I was trying to stay strong but even I could here the worry in my voice. "Oh, what makes you think I won't?" "Because you did it too..." He didn't like that so he punched me on the side.

"Phil? Phil?" I was startled out of my thoughts, Dan was calling my name. "Yes?" "What's wrong? It looked like you where thinking but you looked sad." "I was just thinking about the day before I left you all alone,"
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