Healer

Chapter 30

"Yes!"

He slams his hand into the table. "You're not admitting it! You're not admitting that apart of ye loves him! That apart of ye wants to save his soul- make him good!"

I gape, angrily. "That is not true!"

"Dinnae lie to me, Gillian!"

My voice raises an octave higher in my rage. "Do you think I liked him coming to me, desperate to receive his pleasure, that he didn't even care that it physically hurt me to sleep with him? That he's never seen the face I make when I fall apart thinking of him? Do you think I liked the fact that Josephine was his and not yours? I'd let him go in a heartbeat if the decision was rational! But condemning him to prison for something he was forced into in the first place would be horrifying, MacCallan!"

He breathes deeply, staring at me. "So, I've already lost ye. Again. I've lost count how many times it's happened now."

"I just- I need to think. I'm scared- can't you understand that?"

"Aye... well, I'm scarit too, Gillian," he mutters, grabbing his blade.

"Stop," I gasp, clutching his arm as he pulls open the door. He looks down at me, sadness more palpable than anger in his stormy eyes. "Please, don't leave. Don't leave me like this."

His words are barely contained. I can hear it. "I told ye I'd not leave without saying it. But, I'd like ye to let me leave this room, now... please."

I release his arms as he turns, exiting into the night. It's begun snowing. The white specks are falling from the sky. I watch as he walks down the path, letting them lead him away from me.

...

The bed drops slightly in the dark, rousing me from sleep. I turn my face to the body settling down beside me, despite the fact that I fell asleep on the other spare bed in the room, figuring he'd want to sleep alone.

His arms come around my shoulders, pulling me into him. I feel his stubble against my cheek and release a breath of relief. That breath releases everything else.

Turning to face him, I hug him tightly, running my hand over the fabric of his shirt into his hair. He's freezing but I know it isn't the reason he chose to lay down beside me.

My tears coat my face as he pushes me back into the bedding, hovering above me. His cock is hard against my thigh as his mouth descends onto mine, roughly. Rougher than I've ever felt him.

I moan when he pins my hands against the bed and away from his body.

"Dinnae move," he says, darkly. I should fear at the harshness in his tone but I shiver instead, wanting him to say more.

"Okay."

His lips leave mine and travel downward over the cease between where my throat ends and my chest begins. His tongue travels down over the peaks of my breasts, over my stomach. Within moments, my body stiffens, realizing what he's doing.

He pulls the covers from my body and pulls my legs open, grasping me roughly. "I've wanted to do this since I first met ye."

"Callan-" Words leave me.

Eyes closed in pleasure, I tilt my body into his tongue, already shivering. I'm unable to remember a single thing he told me. My hands leave the bedding and descend into his hair, pulling with controlled gentleness.

He pins me down with his hands and his moan reverberates throughout my body.

"Oh my God," I cry out, holding his face to my body. His tongue moves fast then slow, consistently. I don't even realize I'm falling apart until a sob releases from some deep part of me, causing my entire body to convulse in his strong grip.