A/N: Long update for keeping you guys waiting! Hope you like it! xx
I deflate onto the pillow, still reeling from the horrifying pain I've endured the past day. It's over now.
My baby is here.
I open my eyes drowsily, struggling for breath and look down at the midwife rested at the end of the bed. There are no cries.
There's no sound and I feel my heart stop in fear.
Everything begins to slow.
A single tear descends from Ann's eye, staring at the child, completely still in the woman's hands. I begin to feel a tight, twisting in my chest and I shake my head, disbelieving.
"I'm- I'm sorry... mistress," the woman utters, painfully.
Ann rushes to my side as I go weak, deflating into the mattress.
"No! No, no!"
"Gillian, look at me!"
"Give me her! Now!" I scream, trying to move forward. Ann presses down on my chest, shaking her head. "She's alright! She's alive! She has to be-"
"You need to remain calm, Gillian! You're still losing blood!"
The door opens in a flash and Lachlan is suddenly there. He turns away immediately from the sight before him, placing his hand over his mouth with a low gutted sound.
Ann cups my head, breathing in and out deeply. "Please, calm yourself, Gillian!"
"My baby..." I sob, reaching out. The midwife, stands with the small little girl wrapped in a cloth and hands her fragile body down to me. I shake my head in dismay when she's set in my arms and feel my vision blur.
I struggle to remain conscious but it's inevitable.
I lose sight of her.
I blink, tiredly, feeling a hand caressing my face lightly. I turn my head, finding Lachlan seated beside the bed. His eyes are hollow and hurt- reminding me suddenly of what I've lost.
He smiles softly. "Hello."
I try to give something back, anything. I try but fail, slowly falling to pieces. He looks down, spiritlessly as I shake my head, trying to get ahold of myself.
"Where-where is she?"
"Buried... We- had to. You've been... under for a while."
The pain intensifies. "Why? Why did it happen? I went through all of that and she's still not here!"
"I don't know why, Gill. I don't... I'm sorry. I know ye really-"
He doesn't finish- maybe he can't. Wiping my face, I blow out a shaky breath. "I'm-I'm sorry too."
"Don't worry about me. I'll- I'm fine," he says softly, resting his hand over mine. "You're still not doing too well. You're going to need to build your strength up again."
I look away and he grabs my face, turning it. "Listen to me, you need to get better, alright? Ye can't just give up!"
"I can though," I whisper, softly, staring at him evenly. His brows turn down angrily and he gapes in disbelief.
"Still that willing to get away from me, huh?"
I shake my head. "It's not even that anymore... I'm just- I'm just so sick of feeling loss! I'm sick of loving something and having it torn from my fucking hands!"
YOU ARE READING
Two very different worlds. Two very different men. And one woman who has to choose between the life that she knew and the one that lies ahead... ----------------------------------------------------------------- Gillian Clarke finds herself thrust...