Finding Lily

40- Lily

Graduation day. Surrounded by kids I still didn't like. Wearing a white cap and gown that cost as much as my textbooks. Jane had done my hair, curling it into loose brown waves. She did my make-up, too. Just a little bit, just enough to cover up imperfections and add a little pop to my eyes and lips.

For the first time, I could actually admit that I looked good. Thanks to my Mediterranean mother, my skin had a natural olive color that complimented my dark hair quite nicely. My cheeks weren't as puffy anymore and I had finally begun to develop curves.

"Congrats, grad!" Jane yelled when we got back to our room, imitating every balloon and banner we'd seen along the way. We'd just spent four hours listening to the dean calling off names and now, we had a party to get ready for.

I threw off my cap and gown onto the bed, leaving me in just a knee length white dress. "My dad didn't come."

Jane's smile flipped to a frown. "Shit. I hoped he would."

A loud crashing sound from the master bedroom caused us to both run across the hall. Jane made it to the open doorway first, stopping when she saw her mother.

"That no good, lying piece of shit." Regina roared. Broken glass was scattered along the plush white carpet. It was from a vase that had been sitting on the fireplace mantle, smashed to a hundred blue and pink pieces.

"What happened?" Jane asked.

"He left. He left me." Regina cried. Her eyes turned to me in an instant. Suddenly, she was storming over with a piece of paper in her hands, waving it in front of my face. "What did you say to him?"

"Mom, calm down. She doesn't know anything."

I took the note from Regina's hands. All it had scribbled on it was two lines. "I'm sorry. Tell Lily I love her."

What the flying fuck?

"He's gone?" I stuttered. My heart felt heavy all of a sudden. The note fell out of my hands. I couldn't breathe. I stumbled back into the wall and kept my gaze on Regina, praying it wasn't true.

Regina's expression softened at the sight of mine. "Shit, honey, I'm so sorry."

My eyes blurred. I had to get out of there. Tears started streaming down my face as I staggered down the hallway. When I got to my room, I sat on the floor with my back against the bed, sobs taking over my soul.

Jane sat next to me a moment later. She put a hand around my shoulders, letting out some sympathetic tears of her own.

Eventually, I looked up through stinging eyes. What would happen now? Where would I go? Would he ever come back? And the most burning question, the one I couldn't bear to ask, why did he leave?

"You're staying with us, Lily. As long as you want." Jane reassured me.

I sniffled. "Regina probably doesn't want me to."

"I don't care. You're staying, no matter what she says."

I blew my nose into a tissue that Jane handed me. The sobs were over now. They were replaced with something far more powerful. Anger.

"That fucking asshole." I growled as I stood up. Reaching into my bedside table, I pulled out the bottle of vodka that always seemed to be there. After taking a swig, I looked back at Jane. "We're still going to that party right?"

She blinked, looking between me and the bottle. She knew I was losing it. She also knew she wouldn't be able to stop me. Instead, she could be by my side, making sure I didn't do anything exceptionally stupid. "Ok. Yeah." Her words were hesitant.

"Honestly, good riddance. He was a fucking awful father anyway."

Jane watched as I paced around the room, taking swigs every now and then. She sat on the floor, helpless, desperately looking for ways to bring me back down. I read it all over her expression. I knew her well enough by then to know how much this was killing her. Usually, she made me strong enough to deal with the constant disappointment from my father. Not today. I just needed one day to get it out of my system.

I didn't care if I never saw that son of a bitch again.