Cold 2 ( Winter's Diary)

Chapter 45: No Angel

"Fine, I'll come by" I said.

"Great! I'll see you tomorrow " he said

"Alright bye"

The Next Day

I was in rehearsals practicing for Noni and Jacob's wedding anniversary that's happening in a few weeks. I know she said she didn't need a band but how else was I suppose to sing from a karaoke machine or something. My music instructor Lyrica has been training me. She's also on love and hip-hop but Los Angeles. She does background vocals for and writes songs for everyone in the industry. So I knew I was in good hands. I was struggling a little bit every time; I would sing she would stop to intervene or say my note was off. I've never been good with constructive criticism and take offense to everything but I'm working on it. Noni wanted me to sing 1+1 by Beyoncé and because I love her dearly I was willing to do it. I just knew I couldn't fuck up I'm being watched everyone has smart phones one mistake and I'm dragged through the mud on the shade room.

Make love to me

When my days look low
Pull me in close and don't let me go


Make love to me

So when the world's at war,that our love will heal us all


Help me let down my guard

"I sung "Make love to me me me me"

"Okay stop " she said.

"Lyrica" I yelled. "What? You're not giving me that ump your giving me a 70 percent right now I need you at 100" she said. I don't know what was going on but I just started to get teary eyed.

"Honey what's going on? She asked sitting me down. "I don't know" I said wiping my eyes. "It's something going on" she said lifting her brow. "I'm just stressed that's all. You know my ex been through some things. I ended up getting pregnant then I had an abortion then I left town for a while then he follows me home apologizes and were working our way to good terms so I don't know why I can't stop crying" I said

"Is it the abortion? She asked.

"I don't know .. Maybe" I said blowing my nose. "Hmm is he around like do you two live together? I asked.

"No we haven't lived together for years even after this fallout we have our separate homes. " I said

"Does he want you to move back in with him or do you want to??

"Yeah he wants me to but I won't. I don't think it will help. There's so much damage that has to be fixed, It'll just be unhealthy and I can't endure another heartbreak" I explained

"I think you miss him badly but your pride wont show it. Your scared that things will go bad again and honestly girl if you miss home go home. Seems like your going with your mind and not your heart" she said.

"Well last time I used my heart and not my mind and ended up being heartbroken so I don't know" I sobbed.

"I feel you, just try not to be build that wall up completely" she said. She was right I do miss Chres a little but I know I go home to him all were going to do is have sex and nothing will be resolved. That's what happened before and look where it got us.

"All this emotion your feeling put it in your voice make me believe it" she said.

"One more time"

I sat back on the chair placing the mic near me. If I ain't got nothing, I got you


If I ain't got something, I don't give a damn