Stupid things I've done

If you loved me, you wouldnt do anything.

Me and Diane walked into the main room together, tears streaming down my miniature face. I wiped my eyes dry and stood before Leila.
"Leila, me & Aria need to talk to you about something very important" Diane started. Leila nodded and asked what we needed to talk about.
"So , Leila, you know mummy adopted you when you were very little and you don't know who your really mummy is?"
"Yes." Leila replied, her blue eyes glowing. Her eyes were the exact same color as Ezra's. Her chin too. But she had my crooked nose. This was the first time I'd met my daughter for the first time in five years and I already love her. I am able to take her out for days out now and do all things mumsy.
"Well, Aria is you're real mummy." Diane said, jumping straight into the subject. Leila looked dazzled, then angry, then excited. She bounced up and down and ran to me, and cuddled me. This was the exact opposite reaction I'd expected. "Mummy I've missed you" she called out. I smiled, and a tear flew out of my left eye. "I've missed you too baby."
**
Finally- Leila and I were heading home. Home sweet home. I was able to start a family.
But without Ezra, it wouldn't ever seem like a proper family. "Mummy why haven't you been my mummy for so long?" Leila asked, looking at me hopefully.
"Well, Leila, when mummy had you, she was very sick. And so the doctors handed you to Diane because I couldn't look after you properly, sweetheart."
"And why wasn't daddy my daddy for very long?" She replied. Ezra hadn't known that Diane had custody over Leila, so he hadn't seen her for five years either. I didn't know how to answer that question. But I had to, for Leila's sake.
"Well, daddy loves you very much. But daddy didn't know where you were."
"What is daddy's name? I know yours mummy, you have a pretty name. Aria"
I smiled and indicated left. "Daddy's name is Ezra"
"Ezra is a nice name."
"Yes. Ezra is a lovely name, baby. But we won't see daddy today, or tomorrow."
"Why?"
"Because... daddy and mummy don't get along" I lied.
"You should. Because you're daddy and mummy."
"I know, baby, but we don't." I hated lying to Leila. I parked in front of my house and unbuckled Leila from her infant car-seat. She ran to the front door and I let her in. "Mummy will be back in one minute" I called out.
I ran upstairs to change into my Pyjamas. I wasn't planning to go anywhere, so from now on, it was a lazy day. Suddenly, there was a loud vibration coming from my bedside table. I picked up my phone and read the contact calling me. Ezra.
I clapped my hand over my mouth and clicked answer. I should answer. But I just felt as if I couldn't decline. I brushed my hair back as if he was watching me. "Hello?"
"Aria..." - his voice made my insides tingle. I hadn't heard it in what seemed like forever. But, in fact , i heard it yesterday.
"Ezra you can't call here anymore"
"Aria , why? What happened."
"I made a promise"
"A promise?! What sort of promise!?"
"Ezra. Stop"
"No, Aria. What are you talking about?"
"I got Leila back. Our daughter."
There was a moments silence. I could hear his heavy breathing. I wanted to hug him and tell him everything.
"But I also made a pact. With your mother."
"Aria! What 'pact'?"
"That if I shut you out of mine and Leila's life, Diane would let me have Leila back, and she would never bother me again. But I don't want to shut you out. I want you in Leila's life, and I want you in mine forever. Because Ezra I want us to be together again, but I know we can't and I want us to a family but I just..."
I suddenly realised what I'd just blurted out. I didn't care. At least it was off my chest.
"Aria... you don't think I want that too? I just can't believe my mother would do that. Believe me when I get hold of her..."
"Ezra don't do anything."
"Aria I have to"
"If you loved me you won't"
"Fine."
I smiled to myself and felt my cheeks burn with happiness. "That says something." I reply, my smile reaching my ears.