Marked

Chapter Fourteen

"I want you to put me into training."

"I heard you the first time," Copenhagen stated, though not unkindly. He tapped his pen against his desk while contemplating her as she stood in the doorway to his office.

"Let me ask you this," He sat up in his chair. "Why do you want to do this? Why now?"

"Because I need to feel useful again."

"Well what does your mother have to say about this?"

"Why does that matter?" Rachel asked, growing impatient. "I'm an adult. I don't have to run this or anything else by her."

"I get that you're trying to help, Rachel, I do. I admire it even. But I'm not sure if this would be the best course of action for you given everything you've been through."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"I'm afraid you haven't exactly been mentally stable since you arrived on the ships and I worry you might be making this rash decision because your emotions are running high."

"This isn't an impulse decision," she insisted, trying her best not to become angry with him.

If she got angry, she lost.

She had to keep her cool to convince him that she was more than capable of doing this. "I've thought a lot about it and it's something I need to do. You need more people and I'm willing to fight so just put me in."

"Rachel—"

"You're not listening." Rachel groaned. "You need me and I need you. Think about it. Nicolas's daughter, fighting against him, proving her loyalty to you all. Wouldn't that make your people happy?"

"This is about more than proving your loyalty, Rachel. This is about your track record with killing. War is all about killing and I hope you'll excuse my bluntness but I don't think you have what it takes to fight in a war."

Rachel grimaced but didn't pursue the argument. She could clearly see that it was over. But he was wrong. She was stronger now; she could take whatever life threw at her. Most importantly, she was no longer afraid.

"Nothing I say will make you change your mind."

It wasn't a question but he answered anyway.

"I'm afraid not."

"You're making a mistake," She spun on her heel, making a slight screeching noise as the sole of her shoes rubbed against the linoleum.

........................................................................................................

She just had to find someone willing to train her. It didn't matter that Copenhagen had said no, she'd find a way.

According to the calendar posted outside the dining room, it was December now. It was so cold that it physically hurt to be outside which made what she was doing even more insane.

She sat on the same bench she'd been hogging for the past three days, watching the guys come and go. She brought a notepad and pencils and practiced her drawing though most of it was just lines and swirls anyway but at least it helped her look busy.

She watched the instructors, trying to find one that might be willing to help her but she didn't know or trust any of them. She'd spent too much time in the kitchen and the list of ship people she knew could be counted on one hand only.

This morning, Dr. Everest strolled by her on his way to the training ship, medical bag in hand.

It looked like the guys were due for another physical today.