Miss Jackson 2: Mrs. Urie

Chapter 19: Do you want to forgive her?

"Bren, help me with the tree" I call to Brendon from downstairs, staring at the box of decorations. After a few seconds I hear his footsteps come down the stairs and then into the living room.
"What do you need help with?" He asks, his xbox headphones sitting around his neck and only his boxers (I guarantee he was playing upstairs without those on before but put them on to come down here, I still haven't given in to his naked thing. I don't care it's weird) he's been playing fallout 4 all day which I don't mind but I would like him to help me with this.
"Just the lights really, I can't get all the way around." I tell him.
"Hold on guys, gotta help the wife" he says into his mic. "Just play without me for a while...it will only take a little bit...I am not whipped...you're all just jealous I'm the only one in the group that's in a relationship" he says and takes his headphones off.
"And over the age of 12" I joke and he playfully rolls his eyes. He helps me wrap the multicolored lights around the tree with ease, we finish after about 5 minutes.
"Looks good" I sigh, pulling away so I can the tree its in entirety.
"Yeah, just wait till you get the rest of the decorations on" he looks at it too.
"Alright you can go play your games" I laugh, smacking his bare back lightly. He smiles at me and puts headphones back on.
"I'm back guys, what's going on?" He says running up the stairs.
"Try not to get in to many fights with those 12 year olds!" I call.
After that I place the decorations on until I've run out of room on the tree, then I turn off the lights and smile up at it. My first tree with my own family. Growing up, we never put the tree together, it was always done when I got up in the morning, my mom would have me put the star at the top and then she'd take a picture of me. Every night before my bed time I found myself laying under the tree admiring the way it looked from underneath, my mom would always come and lay next to me, promising me the best Christmas and it always was....but now that's gone, just a memory. My mom has become something terrible and now she's stuck in prison until I'm 40. She deserves it but I just miss my old mom, she was the best mom ever, she took me away from my dad and made sure I was happy all the time. She promised me I would never see him again...she broke that promise I suppose. I begin to tear up placing my head in my hands, letting the tears fall on to my hand.
"D?" Brendon's soft voice makes my head shoot up.
"Yeah?" I cough, clearing my throat, the only light in the bottom half of the house is the Christmas tree, shining on his face.
"What's wrong? Why are you sitting in the dark?" He asks turning on the light, I squint and then look down at my hand, makeup smeared across it and I reach up and use the back of my hand to wipe what's left of eyeliner and mascara off my wet cheeks.
"I just...I was thinking about my mom" I sniff. "How when I was little her and I would stare up at the tree and talk about anything random"
"Oh" he frowns, sitting down and wrapping his arm around my back.
"I miss the old her, I miss the woman that when she found out what my dad was doing to me, took me away and promised to protect me." I confess, intertwining my fingers together, with my palms raised up.
"I know you do D. Maybe one day we go and you can try and make amends. I'd hate for you to spend the rest of your life resenting your mother" he offers and I shrug, not looking at him.
"I don't know if I can forgive her, she hurt me physically and mentally" I look over at her.
"Do you want to forgive her?" He questions. I ponder the question, do I want to forgive her? Of course, she's my mother and although she messed up she was still a great mom for the first 18 years of my life.
"Y..yeah. I do." I nod.
"How about we go visit her soon then, what happened that time you visited her?" He asks.
"She tried to apologize but I go so mad at her I yelled and stormed off" I sigh.
"Maybe this time let her talk"
"Yeah, I just...I'm afraid to forgive her and we're happy but I still have to spend the next 18 years without her in my life. She missed my wedding and she's going to miss our children's lives."
"That would suck but at least you know you're okay with your mom" his hand goes up to my hair and he plays with it making me close my eyes.
"Thank you Bren, thank you for helping me. I feel better now" I smile at him, opening my eyes.
"No problem, I love you. Come here" he takes my hand and pulls me to the floor, going under the tree and I laugh as I realize what's he's doing.
"I know I'm not your mom but I just want to say...I love you so much Delilah, you are my whole world and more. I don't ever want to lose you ever. I promise that I will stay by your side no matter what happens. You make me the happiest man alive. I spent 24 years without you and I never want to go another day without you. I need you in my life" he says and I look at him, with a bigger smile than before. I don't say anything and cuddle next to him with a sigh of happiness.
"You and your mom had an idea going, the tree is really pretty from this angle" he intertwined out hands that are in between us and looks in my eyes. He leans over and presses his lips to mine.
"I love you Bren" I sigh.